IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your opinion ?

#people #information #research #business #world
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People have different opinions when it comes to sharing
information
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. Some individuals argue that sharing
information
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 in scientific
research
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,
business
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 and the academic world has more benefits than drawbacks.
While
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 other says that it should be protected because of its vulnerability.
Although
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,
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apply
show examples
 keeping
information
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 safe provides a sense of security,
according to
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 me, widespread
information
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 gives knowledge about the world and broadens people’s horizons. On the one hand, by protecting
information
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, be it
research
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 or
business
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, authors could keep away the pivotal
information
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 for copyright and reduce duplicates in those fields.
For example
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, if big companies like Amazon, Testa and the like had not saved their secret of making their products, other competitors could have copied them and jumped into the market to compete with those big brands.
On the other hand
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, I think that
information
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 should be available freely to augment people's knowledge. Not only can students solve their problems by reading others’
research
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, but they can
also
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 improve
business
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 with the help of looking at others’
business
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 models.
For example
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, when students are stuck in their studies, they always try to find different
research
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 to find the solutions to their problems.
In addition
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 to
this
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, there is plenty of
information
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 available on Google, which will help many people to find the answer.
For example
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, a kid
also
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 knows that if they do not find the answer, they usually try to search on Google. In conclusion,
while
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 it is true that
information
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 should not be disclosed to protect people’s privacy,
however
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, I believe freely available
information
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 plays a key role in increasing one’s awareness about different fields from
business
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 to science to technology.
Submitted by dev22karan on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
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