Success is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person?

Nowadays, we live in a capitalist culture that empowers people's consumption,
therefore
,
this
directly transforms individuals into targets.
For
this
reason, we tend to associate luxury materials
as a result
of a successful career. I think
this
is a completely distorted vision of what real success means.
Instead
of admiring their material possessions, we should observe more about what skills they own. Is it true that audiences tend to look first at lifestyles
instead
of their daily routines or how much they work
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Some considered successful person will spend their accomplishment on material belongings,
however
, we can't just evaluate their rise based on their consumption. Real power should be measured on skills and what they have built with them. Kanye West is one clear example since he's always been transforming himself across different design and art areas.
This
human doesn't show that much of their belongings but does show what they can do,
that is
what I consider real social power. Another note on measuring achievement is to focus on what are their creations, how many of them and where are they spending the money
instead
of "in what". A successful individual is made on the process of investing in themselves,
while
, producing meaningful work for a community.
This
can be clearly seen in Elon Musk with his entrepreneurial attitude, constantly creating futuristic projects for a better society.
Overall
, I believe that successful humans are those who create and not become consumers.
To conclude
, an individual's power is normally measured by what they can afford,
however
, I strongly disagree with
this
belief. Progress is to generate, create, and innovate building up useful skills that will support personal growth. The secret will lie in those who had the ideas
instead
of the consumers that bought them.
Submitted by celinedoultremontt on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: