IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Nowaday, more and more people commit crimes. What are causes and solutions?

#nowaday #people #crimes
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Crime has increased dramatically during these past few decades. population are doing all sorts of crimes which is unbearable and critical.
This
Linking Words
 is happening day by day but no solution has fixed it. The shortage of employment has been the highest issue of them all, they are families who are stealing to feed their families.
This
Linking Words
 problem has affected caused the crisis not to stop. Apart from the lack of jobs public is raping kids in the name of money whereby are advised by the traditional heals to do so
this
Linking Words
 will make them wealthy which is insane. Our youth killing has affected the way a boyfriend kills a girlfriend for unknown reasons.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the police force is lacking to comply with their duties though sometimes they do their best but the court dismisses cases because of lack of evidence. Evidence is stolen
while
Linking Words
 they are working on the case
therefore
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 discourages the work force working hard. Solutions are starting by providing folk with jobs way by they will be able to support their offspring, take their children to school and pay the household bills. Different projects are supposed to be introduced and educate our nation ,
furthermore
Linking Words
-our democracy must come together and not allow criminals in our communities by not hiding them from the law force. Justice must be served
accordingly
Linking Words
 to introduce killing especially to those who rape and kill
instead
Linking Words
 of giving them five years in prison. Those who steal vehicles have ten centuries of sentence, shoplifting five years and no parole must be given to them because they are a danger to our society. These will keep us away from these thugs because they are
also
Linking Words
 a bad influence on our children.
Submitted by isabeldube30 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: