IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that spending large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities is a waste of money. They think that this money should be used to improve existing public transport. To what extent do you agree / disagree ?

#people #sums #money #railway #lines #trains #cities #waste #transport
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Some
people
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 think that constructing fast
trains
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 between
cities
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 is a
wast
Correct your spelling
waste
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 of money and should spend the money on developing existing public transport,
whereas
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others
Correct quantifier usage
other
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 groups claim that there is nothing bad in building new railway lines. From my point of view, I agree with the latter view for many reasons, described in the following paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, constructing fast
trains
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to
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in
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 other
cities
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 offers a better life for all
people
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 around the country. One of the major
reason
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reasons
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 is to reduce
traffic
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congestions
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congestion
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, especially during public
holiday
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holidays
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. Most
people
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 often travel
and
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apply
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back
their
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to their
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 hometown
in
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at
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Add an article
a weekend
the weekend
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weekend
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weekends
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 or public
holiday
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holidays
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,
leaded
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led
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 to the
traffic
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 on the road.
Thus
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, the fast
trains
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 will be a better alternative to get away from the
traffic
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.
In addition
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, taking very fast
trains
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 would help
people
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 save more time,
comparing
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compared
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 to other public
transports
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transport
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 like a bus.
Furthermore
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, building new railway lines not only causes
the
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apply
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transportation faster
,
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apply
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 but
also
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improve
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improves
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an
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the
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economic
Replace the word
economy
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in
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of
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 the country.
In other words
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,
holiday makers
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holidaymakers
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 mostly decide to visit only one or two
cities
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 because of
a
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the
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 distance. They need to spend a long time between each place.
Therefore
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,
tourist
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tourists
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 could visit many more
cities
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 easier by the fast
trains
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, leading to improve
the
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apply
show examples
economy. In conclusion, I strongly disagree that it is a waste of money to construct new railway lines for very fast
trains
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 because it provides many benefits to
population
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the population
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 and the country
such
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 as reducing
traffic
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 congestion and
save
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saving
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 more time, and
increase
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increasing
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 the economy
tourism
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of tourism
show examples
.
Submitted by foamary41 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Transportation needs
  • Infrastructure
  • High-speed rail
  • Economic impact
  • Development
  • Sustainable transport
  • Carbon footprint
  • Congestion
  • Accessibility
  • Inclusive
  • Long-term benefits
  • Short-term benefits
  • Public transport system
  • Investment
  • Urbanization
What to do next:
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