The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#aim #science #people #lives

Nowadays, many countries in

this

world are in a race to achieve their aim with

science

. The key to many problems humans face is

science

for reducing hunger, finding new cures, and creating a better economy.

However

, there is a strong argument that the public should be the priority and the essential goal of

science

should

Verb problem

is to

show examples

make humans live better.

This

essay will examine why I agree with

this

statement.

To begin

with, the development of

science

benefits people's

lives

. Many invented cures and discoveries of technology bring people to a new era.

For example

hundred

Correct article usage

a hundred

show examples

years

before

Rephrase

ago

show examples

, someone who was infected by the flu close to died since there was no knowledge about the cure and how to prevent it.

However

science

has been growing, scientists invented the vaccine, and the public nowadays can live side by side with the flu.

As a result

science

safe

Correct your spelling

saved

show examples

many

lives

Furthermore

science

aims to broaden people's knowledge to be aware of the environment. Many nations in

this

world do not have a good geography. Africa and some parts of Asia have severe drought, and most of them cannot produce their own food because of the bad soil.

In addition

, scientists discovered how to make some vegetation suitable for

this

condition, and they did it.

For instance

, In Indonesia, there is a place with poor land conditions, but with some experiments on vegetation, nowadays, they have poor land conditions, but with some experiments on greens, nowadays, they are able to grow some plants that suit poor soil.

This

helps society to improve their

lives

by growing their own food.

To conclude

, the goal of

science

is helpful for the community.

Moreover

, we already saw many positive impacts, and we are waiting for more discoveries to make our

lives

better.

Submitted by ieltscuns2022 on Sat Jun 17 2023

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Task Achievement

Ensure to thoroughly respond to the task's question. This essay somewhat strays from answering to what extent you agree or disagree with the statement.

Coherence and Cohesion

There is some repetition and overuse of certain phrases which reduce the fluidity and effectiveness of your argument. Try to implement a more varied vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

Avoid grammatical errors. In place of 'science safe many lives', use 'science saves many lives'.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

297 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

crucial role
technological advancements
medical discoveries
life-changing inventions
innovations
solutions to human problems
enhancing quality of life
improvement of healthcare
transportation
communication
agriculture
energy sectors
eradication of diseases
prolongation of life expectancy
global challenges
climate change
overpopulation
food security
developed world
underprivileged communities

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Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree.

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Some people believe that the government should provide financial support to artists, such as painters and musicians, while others argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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