Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix this problem.

Nowadays, obesity is becoming a vital concern

Change preposition

among

show examples

youngsters. Because of

this

Linking Words

many

children

Use synonyms

suffer from health-related issues. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will be implementing the possible grounds and logical solutions to overcome

this

Linking Words

issue.

To begin

Linking Words

with, there are a plethora of concerns

Change preposition

about

show examples

fatique

Correct your spelling

fatigue

and health-related problems in teenagers. First and foremost, an unhealthy lifestyle is an essential concern of obesity in young people. The first instance of

this

Linking Words

is eating fast food. Youngsters in today's world prefer to eat fast food rather than homemade food.

Likewise

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

don't like to go for physical exercise and don't engage in any physical

games

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, a survey conducted by Indian Turbine in which they analyzed the physical activities

Change preposition

show examples

teenagers

has

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

decreased by 12% in 2022

then

Linking Words

back 2011.

Additionally

Linking Words

, in

today

Change noun form

today's

show examples

era both parents are working and don't give proper time to the health of their

children

Use synonyms

. Controversy, there is a score of concerns because of fatigue and health problems in teenagers. These issues can be overcome by taking some suitable manners. One among them is that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

Parents should

regular

Change the adjective

regularly

show examples

update on the health of their

children

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as what they are eating and which physical activities they are doing.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, try to keep them away as much as possible from

sanitary

Correct article usage

a sanitary

show examples

lifestyle to

exampliary

Correct your spelling

exemplary

use of phones and video

games

Use synonyms

In addition

Linking Words

, the community should organize some

games

Use synonyms

tournaments and involve their

children

Use synonyms

in traditional

games

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as footfall. In conclusion, it can not be denied that obesity is

the

Correct article usage

show examples

major concern in some

society

Fix the agreement mistake

societies

show examples

However

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

took

Change the form of the verb

taking

show examples

some initiative we will

dimolish

Correct your spelling

diminish

this

Linking Words

issue from

root

Add an article

the root

show examples

taniamall786

Jun 18, 2023

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Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Sedentary lifestyle
Screen time
Balanced diet
Nutrients
Physical education
Parental influence
Aggressive marketing
Emotional stress
Coping mechanism
Caloric intake
Processed foods
Nutrient-dense
Health awareness
Fast food industry

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Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix this problem.

In many countries, women and men are working full-time. It is, therefore, logical for women and men to share household tasks. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people around the world are still relying on the private car as their major means of transportation. Describe some of the problems over-reliance on cars can cause, and suggest some solutions

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Nowadays, students sleep less than they used to in the past . what do you think is the reason behinf this? what are effects on individuals