: Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important for children's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?

#art #classes #children #development #subjects #school

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Subjects

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as painting and drawing are as beneficial for children's development as other

subjects

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school

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which is why it should be obligatory in high

school

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. I completely disagree with

this

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statement because not everyone likes art

classes

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and some teenagers want to focus only on the

classes

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they actually need in order to get to universities.

Firstly

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, not all adolescents find those types of

classes

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fascinating and they do not want to waste their time on something they do not like.

For example

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, these days teens have a lot of

subjects

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school

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, and they spend half of their day only

being

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

school

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, and

then

Linking Words

after they have to do their homework. If these

subjects

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will be

Wrong verb form

are

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included in their everyday

school

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program, they have to stay at

school

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even longer and they will have even less free time for things they actually enjoy.

Furthermore

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, the

last

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two years of high

school

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are really difficult for most teens. Teenagers have plans about what they going to do after graduating, but

due to

Linking Words

the exams, they experience constant pressure and stress.

For instance

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, if they want to get into university, they need to pass

SAT

Correct article usage

the SAT

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this

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exam includes math and English because of that they will

be wanting

Wrong verb form

want

show examples

to concentrate only on

subjects

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they need and will not have a lot of time for other

classes

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. In conclusion,

although

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art

classes

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can have positive consequences on children's development, I believe that students should have a right to choose

classes

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themselves depending on their goals and

Correct word choice

whether

show examples

they like it or not.

Submitted by maat2074 on Sun Jun 18 2023

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introduction conclusion present

The conclusion is effective; however, you may want to clearly restate your main points to reinforce your argument.

logical structure

Your essay is coherent and logically structured, but aim for smoother transitions between some paragraphs to enhance the flow: "However," "Nevertheless," "In contrast," etc.

relevant specific examples

To improve task achievement, you could provide a broader range of specific examples to better illustrate your points.

introduction conclusion present

The essay has a well-defined introduction and conclusion that clearly present and summarize the writer's point of view.

supported main points

The main points are relevant to the topic and are supported by examples.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

263 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cognitive development
Visual-spatial skills
Fine motor skills
Emotional expression
Creative thinking
Problem-solving skills
Cultural awareness
Historical context
Interpersonal skills
Teamwork
Collaboration
Self-esteem
Sense of accomplishment

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: Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important for children's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?