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In most countries fast food is becoming cheaper and more available. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #food #development
In a significant number of countries fast
food
 is becoming more accessible and needs a lower amount of money to buy them. I think
this
 development is negative because can cause obesity and change young eating habits.
To begin
 with, the population have changed their consumption habits and using more fast
food
,
this
 new method of diet is because of the hectic lifestyle. fast
food
 contains a high amount of fat and other ingredients that are not beneficial. These materials can cause obesity in the long term for those who eat them, as a survey shows, a normal hamburger needs 3 days to digest completely.
Moreover
, the other ingredients,
such
 as salt and sugar, can affect other aspects of the human body,
also
 , in my view, there is no positive point in consuming
this
food
.
Additionally
, because of convenient access to fast
food
 and its good taste , children usually consider
this
 item as the main one, and
this
 might affect their hygiene states in the long term because their bodies react the same as the older generation.
For instance
, trends indicate that the amount of fast
food
 consumed by the population increased dramatically over these years,
in addition
, the number of obese people has increased simultaneously. I believe it is better to use more healthy
food
 rather than
this
 disadvantageous
food
. In conclusion, fast
food
 has spread steadily over the years
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and has several disadvantages
such
 as health issues and weight. In my opinion, its drawbacks are significant and it is positive to replace it with beneficial dishes to help both the young and the old citizens.
Submitted by soroushnorouzi0478 on

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introduction clarity
Ensure that your introduction more clearly outlines the topic and your position to better guide the reader.
sentence structure
Work on varying your sentence structures to improve readability and flow. This will make your argument more engaging and easier to follow.
use of examples
Add more specific data, research findings, or real-life examples to strengthen your main points and make your argument more compelling.
grammar and typos
Revise your essay for minor grammatical errors and typos to enhance the overall quality of your writing.
task response
You have effectively addressed the prompt by discussing the disadvantages of the increasing availability and affordability of fast food.
essay structure
Good job on structuring your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
use of examples
Your examples related to health issues effectively support your argument against the proliferation of fast food.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Convenience
  • Nutritional value
  • Obesity epidemic
  • Job creation
  • Disposable income
  • Culinary diversity
  • Processed foods
  • Economic stimulus
  • Cultural homogenization
  • Sustainable practices
  • Public health
  • Consumerism
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