In conclusion, a lot of governments are investing money in new technology as the ratio of criminals is increasing. As a consequence, this action can bring about positive changes and this is a suitable way to use government money

#conclusion #governments #money #technology #ratio #criminals #consequence #action #changes #government

In light of the proliferation of

technology

, it may indeed be true to claim that

mechanic

Replace the word

mechanical

show examples

equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

are increasingly becoming the focus of

government

Fix the agreement mistake

governments

show examples

Change preposition

around

show examples

the globe.

This

due to

the high demand of residents for a better quality of life.

This

writer contends that the increasing rate of

criminal

Replace the word

crime

show examples

is the reason for the expenditure of

government

and

this

is a suitable way to use

money

. It is vital to understand that a significant benefit of

technology

in people’s lives is the modernization of the healthcare industry. Gone are the days of long lines in the outpatient ward and hours of waiting for a doctor's consultation. Patients can schedule a hospital visit using their mobile phones and check if their doctor's office is open.

This

way, hospital procedures are

also

faster and more efficient.

For instance

, healthcare document scanners are now used by many medical facilities to digitize old medical files for easier access. By moving printed documents to a digital system, any healthcare staff can conveniently access a patient's record with a computer. It

also

lessens the risk of misplacing or losing a patient's records since all information will be stored safely on a web application.

Not withstanding

Correct your spelling

Notwithstanding

show examples

the reality of offence, it prompts

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

to enhance the security system.

For

this

reason, financial crises around the world are becoming more serious.

As a result

, many people will run into difficult situations, unemployment and have to steal

money

or refreshments to cover their expenditures.

Furthermore

, the global political situation is becoming more and more stressful,

therefore

, governments can apply up-to-date

technology

such

as cameras to observe and save their citizen.

For example

, in Tan Son Nhat airport, a crucial place where a lot of passengers visit every day, The

government

has applied a lot of cameras, checking gates , and x-ray machines to save people from terrorism. In conclusion, a lot of governments are investing

money

in new

technology

as the ratio of criminals is increasing.

As a consequence

this

action can bring about positive changes and

this

is a suitable way to use

government

money

Tue Apr 16 2024

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Structure

Ensure a clear and consistent structure throughout your essay, with distinct paragraphs each addressing a single main idea.

Coherence

To enhance coherence, use a variety of linking phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs.

Task Response

It's essential to directly address the question throughout the essay to maintain a strong focus on the task requirements.

Examples

Integrate examples more seamlessly within your arguments, ensuring they directly support your main points.

Language

Consider employing a wider range of grammatical structures and vocabulary to demonstrate language proficiency.

Introduction/Conclusion

You've effectively included an introduction and a conclusion that encapsulate the main points of your essay, contributing to a good overall structure.

Examples

The essay provides specific examples, like the implementation of healthcare technology and security measures at Tan Son Nhat airport, which strengthens your argument.

Coherence

Your essay presented a logical flow of ideas, enhancing its readability and cohesiveness.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

349 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In conclusion, a lot of governments are investing money in new technology as the ratio of criminals is increasing. As a consequence, this action can bring about positive changes and this is a suitable way to use government money

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

In many countries, people decide to have children at a later age than in the past. Why? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays many people choose to be self employed rather than work for a company or organisation. Why is this the case ? What are the disadvantages?

Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extand do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

some university students want to learn about other subjects, discuss both the view that is important and the view that studying for a qualification should be the priority

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+