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Band 6.5

The bar chart provides data on the number of biths given per woman in 6 Gulf countries in 2 seperate years 1990 and 2000.

The bar chart provides data on the number of biths given per woman in 6 Gulf countries in 2 seperate years 1990 and 2000.
#bar #data #biths #woman #gulf #countries #seperate #years
The bar chart compares the number of births each
woman
 in six countries (
Bahrain
,
Kuwayt
Correct your spelling
Kuwait
, Qatar,
Oman
, S.
Arabia
,
UAE
Correct word choice
and UAE
show examples
) between 1990 and 2000.
Overall
, it can be seen that
Oman
 and S.
Arabia
 had the
highly
Change the adverb
high
show examples
 rates in both years.
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Bahrain
Change noun form
Bahrain's
show examples
 lowest
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each
years
Change to a singular noun
year
show examples
. In
Oman
 was about births per
woman
in1990
Correct your spelling
in 1990
. The figure for S.
Arabia
 was slightly lower, but still much highest than other
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
make up
Join the words
makeup
show examples
 6.5
woman
Change to a plural noun
women
show examples
while
Bahrain
 and Kuvayt organise about 3.5 same
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
. Qatar and UAE reached approximately four.
Further
,
Oman
 and S.
Arabia
 fairly declined to over five births given by a
woman
 in 2000 , a fall around 3 other countries witnessed only a major drop in the number of children given birth by one
woman
 in 2000.
Thw
Correct your spelling
The
 figure for
Bahrain
 decreased from over three to two
birtha
Correct your spelling
births
birth
 per
woman
 in 2000
while
 UAE dropped from four to three within the same period time.
Submitted by ieltsteaching0 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words woman, bahrain, oman, arabia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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