IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people think art classes like painting and drawing are as important as other subjects, and they should be compulsory in high school education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #art #classes #subjects #school #education
People find themselves at loggerheads regarding the issue of whether
art
courses
 should be incorporated into high-school curriculums. From where I stand,
art
 syllabi should be mandatory for the following reasons.
To begin
 with, aesthetic
education
 could boost
students
' creativity and imagination ability, which is necessary for all sorts of fields and jobs. In the
courses
 of
art
, juveniles could gain the freedom to express their unique ideas and ground-breaking thoughts in their artwork.
By contrast
, when
students
 in high school merely devote themselves to those conventional core
courses
, they may miss out on the opportunity to enhance their innovativeness, because those subjects
such
 as maths only have standardized answers that
students
 could not accomplish creatively.
Although
 most
students
 may not aim at becoming artists or painters,
students
 with aesthetic backgrounds would be more popular in the general workforce market, since they could design and conceive up-to-date and avant-garde products even in the industrial section.
Therefore
,
students
 would have promising careers thanks to the amelioration of creativity via
art
education
. Admittedly, some people claim that
art
 lessons should be elective and optional since exam-oriented curriculum has been dominant with the aim of
further
 tertiary
education
.
Students
 who focus on traditional disciplines,
such
 as literature and natural science, are more likely to have better academic performance.
However
, I beg to differ, because
art
courses
 could be once or twice a week that will not distract
students
 from their mainline
courses
.
In addition
, some knowledge learned in
art
 classes contributes to the core subjects of
examination
Add an article
the examination
show examples
.
For example
, the basic skills of sketching 3-D models in painting classes could cater to
students
' space imagination which is necessary for the geometry section in maths. To recapitulate, it is my firm conviction that
art
education
 should be imperative in high-school syllabi, for it is the cornerstone of personal vocational prospects and academic performance.
Therefore
, the
students
 should be given the green light to grasp aesthetic
courses
.
Submitted by yuetongli98 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: