In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. What is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#businesses #emphasise #products #development

These days, businesses claim that their goods are different and unique as compared to others. In my opinion, making a great deal of money and people’s requests are the reasons for

this

trend. I am

also

convinced that it has its own drawbacks

such

as economic and environmental consequences. It is my view that business managers are striving to make remarkable progress in their occupations.

Hence

, eye-catching advertisements which are able to manipulate their audiences are more successful at achieving managers their financial goals.

Such

advertisements that emphasise being novel can draw customers’ attention and make considerable profits for their owners.

On the other hand

, with tremendous technological advancements worldwide, customers are in search of brand-new things to fulfil their expectations.

Therefore

, markets are encouraged to produce goods which align with their customers’ preferences.

For example

, Apple Company is updating their products on a regular basis to stay in the competition cycle. I

further

believe that

this

trend has some disadvantages.

Firstly

, people can be convinced to buy things which they do not really need.

This

may result in the development of a consumerism culture that has negative effects on the environment and society. Many people who live in deprived areas find it difficult to purchase

such

new products

due to

financial difficulties.

As a result

, they may encounter mental problems

such

as depression in the long run.

Moreover

, consumerism can cause major problems for the environment.

For instance

, waste disposal may turn into a serious problem for governments. In conclusion, in my view, monetary targets and the customers’ requirements are the main causes of advertising something new. From my perspective,

this

notion can be detrimental in terms of socioeconomic and environmental issues.

Submitted by maryam.nutrition1988 on Sat Apr 13 2024

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Overall Language Use

To improve your score further, consider varying your sentence structures more significantly and incorporating a wider range of vocabulary that is pertinent to the topic at hand. This will enhance the sophistication of your argument and make your essay even more engaging.

Task Achievement

Make sure to support your main points with more detailed examples. While you've provided relevant examples, such as mentioning Apple Company, elaborating on these examples with more depth and specifics can strongly bolster your argument and make your point more convincing.

Coherence & Cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, try to more explicitly link your ideas between paragraphs. This can be achieved through clearer and more direct transition phrases that explicitly connect your points.

Structure

You effectively introduced and concluded your essay, providing clear insight into your perspective on the issue.

Task Response

You've successfully addressed the task, providing logical arguments for both sides of the development and expressing a clear opinion.

Coherence

Your essay maintains a good logical flow, with each paragraph dedicated to a specific aspect of the topic.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

283 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

emphasise
advertising
products
innovation
competitive strategy
consumer dissatisfaction
value

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In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. What is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

ou have a problem with a recently hired employee in your workplace. Write a letter to the HR manager. In your letter: Describe the problem the new employee has caused Explain how other employees about the new employee’s conduct Say how you expect the HR manager to address the situation.

In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

Many students find it difficult to concentrate or pay attention at school .What arre reasons and solution.

You recently sent some documents by post, but they did not arrive. Write a letter to the post manager. In your letter Give details of the situation Describe the documents Say what action you want the post office to take.