IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation
No one in the right mind can contest the argument that owning a house is better than renting it. I am inclined to believe that owning a place to live in is the most important part of
life
.
To begin
 with, I truly believe that buying a
property
 is the best investment, no matter which country you live in.
However
, it is more challenging to buy one in some countries like Iran as you need to pay the whole price in cash. In countries
such
 as
Canada
Add a comma
,Canada
show examples
 the economy is strong enough to provide loans for buyers.
Therefore
, one could purchase a
property
 with a small down payment and pay the rest of the amount as monthly instalments. Another paramount factor that needs to be considered is that rents tend to increase year after year and
this
 means stress and anxiety for
people
 who live in rented places. They have to cut out some expenses to meet the ends. Ultimately
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
 quality decreases day by day and
thus
life
 dissatisfaction increases.
People
 feel more secure in their
owned
Replace the word
own
show examples
property
 as they do not have to deal with the aforementioned problems.
On the other hand
, buying a house or an apartment would be stressful for some
people
 as they cannot afford it. If we consider
this
 matter as an important aspect of
life
 for everyone, it takes away joy from some
people
’s
life
. They struggle all their
life
 to own a
property
 without enjoying a bit of it. On the basis of
aforementioned
Correct article usage
the aforementioned
show examples
 reasons / reasons mentioned above, I am convinced that
people
 should invest their money in a
property
 if they can afford it rather than waste it on
rents
Fix the agreement mistake
rent
show examples
.
However
, it is not applicable to everyone’s lifestyle.
Submitted by chamekhfatima0 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
What to do next:
Look at other essays: