Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some individuals think competition might be encouraged in
children
Use synonyms
,
while
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other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
believe that
children
Use synonyms
might
taught
Change the verb form
be taught
show examples
to be cooperative
are
Correct word choice
and are
show examples
more likely to become useful adults. In the following
essay
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,essay
show examples
I will discuss both
view
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views
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and elaborate
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on it
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it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. On the one hand, a sense of competition makes
children
Use synonyms
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
get tasks done in
much
Add an article
a much
show examples
quicker way.
This
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is going to help to spot their mistakes through
trials
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trial
show examples
and
errors
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error
show examples
. in that
way
Add a comma
,way
show examples
it is much easier for
children
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to tackle
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the problem and the make task done instantly.
For example
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, those
children
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who have a competitive exam are very likely to get a better score in comparison to those who
are not participate
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are not participating
show examples
in the exam of school
such
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as those pupils who are
homeschooling
Wrong verb form
homeschooled
show examples
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
I do not think that encouraging students to be more competitive is
such
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a good idea and it is because
in
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at
show examples
the early
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age
show examples
ages
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,ages
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some students might be very sensitive.
This
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will lead to demotivated students to do more in
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
.
On the other hand
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, some individuals argue that
children
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might be more cooperative rather than competitive. Because it will help them not only how to solve an obstacle in
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
group work, but
also
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the thrill of the challenge and sense of accomplishment make them feel better.
For example
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, those
children
Use synonyms
who are cooperating on a school project
such
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as creating a presentation are very likely to enjoy their work. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
I think
this
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is
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
approach
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
doing
such
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cases. it is because
human
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humans
show examples
are interconnected and sociable species.
Hence
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people who are working on the same project are very productive and it makes them mature. In conclusion, some people believe that competition makes the best out of
children
Use synonyms
and they are able to do their tasks in
much
Add an article
a much
show examples
quicker way.
However
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, some individuals argue that being cooperative is much more productive
that
Correct word choice
than
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being competitive and they become more useful adults.
Submitted by mohammad.saffarian on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • compete
  • cooperate
  • useful
  • adults
  • skills
  • motivation
  • drive
  • resilience
  • failure
  • workplace
  • empathy
  • social skills
  • reduce
  • stress
  • pressure
  • balanced
  • approach
  • ideal
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