It is important for people to take risks, both in their professionals lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is important to take risks in human's personal and professional lives. Taking risks gives people to opportunity to grow faster
whereas
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risk
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ignorers make their
life
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monotonous. In my opinion,
risk
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lovers or takers
getting
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get
show examples
benefits from both personal and professional lives more than
risk
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avoiders. More or less we all know that high
risk
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gives us
the
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apply
show examples
high benefits. If anyone wants to shine in
personal
Correct pronoun usage
their personal
show examples
or professional
life
Use synonyms
have to take
Use synonyms
Add an article
the risk
a risk
show examples
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
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.
Risk
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takers have the opportunity to
learning
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learn
show examples
new things in their
life
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. Which they can use
in
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apply
show examples
many times.
In addition
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, people can set their image as a
pinoneer
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pioneer
in
the
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apply
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society. Namely, one of my
colleague
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colleagues
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always
love
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loves
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to take
the
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apply
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risks in her
life
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. She always
try
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tries
show examples
new things in her
life
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.
Continution
Correct your spelling
Continuation
of her
this
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attitude she submitted a big tender with other large competitors for a multinational company. Surprisingly, she won the tender which leads to
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the company
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company
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company's
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12 lacs taka benefits per year. She set
her self
Correct your spelling
herself
show examples
as a leader of the company. After receiving so many
suceesses
Correct your spelling
successes
in her professional
life
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she started her own
consultation
Replace the word
consulting
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firm. She is now
an
Change the article
a
show examples
suceessful
Correct your spelling
successful
entrepreneur.
On the other hand
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, people who do not take
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risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
or avoid
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risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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became
bore
Wrong verb form
bored
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with their lives. They always do the same thing they used to do. After a certain period of
time
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,time
show examples
they feel frustrated about their selves. Even though sometimes they
commited
Correct your spelling
committed
commit
suicide.
For instance
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, my
cousin
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cousin's
show examples
brother do not want to try
"International
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the "International
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English Learning Test System"
or
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apply
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even though he do not have any interest about to go abroad as he was happy with his current
life
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. After a
while
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, his wife and children were feeling
bore
Wrong verb form
bored
show examples
with the same lifestyle. So, they left him. After that, he was so frustrated that he stops talking with everyone in our family.
Whereas
Linking Words
if he could try or take
Use synonyms
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
he could have been
a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
new place
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
full of opportunities. From the above discussion, I feel that
risk
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lovers have the chance to live in their dreams and they can learn new
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
easily.
Although
Linking Words
, as
risk
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avoiders
happy
Add a missing verb
are happy
show examples
with their
life
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for
short
Add an article
a short
show examples
time;
therefore
Linking Words
, they make their
life
Use synonyms
boring and make
their self
Correct pronoun usage
themself
themselves
show examples
vulnerable
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
a long time.
Submitted by kaynath87 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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