IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #community #work #time #benefit
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Many
people
Use synonyms
 hold the view that adolescents should go to
community
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work
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 in their free time without
salary
Correct article usage
a salary
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because
this
Linking Words
 can help both young
people
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 and the
community
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. In my point of view, I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 opinion.
First,
Linking Words
do
Wrong verb form
doing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
community
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work
Use synonyms
 in your free time helps
teenagers
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 a lot. When participating in
community
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 activities
such
Linking Words
 as volunteering,
helping
Correct word choice
and helping
show examples
 disadvantaged
people
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, they will experience more and learn valuable
life
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 skills. A teenager who joins in
a lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
a lot
lots
show examples
 of unpaid
community
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work
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 will have more
life
Use synonyms
 skills than the one who does not do anything. Because through the
work
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, he can learn many new things from
people
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. Not only that,
through
Correct word choice
but through
show examples
 his
work
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 experience, he will
also
Linking Words
 have valuable materials for future employment.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, when young
people
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 do unpaid
community
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work
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 our
country
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's quality of
life
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 will improve. If
society
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 is contributed by the effort of youth, our
life
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 will develop day by day. Because,when working,
teenagers
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 will have more love for the
country
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 and
society
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 and from there they will always try to dedicate
Correct pronoun usage
themselves for
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the growing
country
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.
The
Correct article usage
A
show examples
society
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 where
teenagers
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 who
are always be
Change the verb form
are always
show examples
 ready to contribute will develop more than the one where
teenagers
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 are usually lazy to
work
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. The USA is a very developed
country
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 with the largest civilization in the world, and American
teenagers
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 are always ready to participate in a lot of
community
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 activities. In conclusion, it
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
 only good for
teenagers
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 to join in unpaid
community
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 activities, but
also
Linking Words
 bring many benefits
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
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. So,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 hope
teenagers
Use synonyms
 in our
country
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 will be ready for doing
community
Use synonyms
work
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 in their free time.
Submitted by huyhungvtv on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • required
  • unpaid
  • community work
  • benefit
  • teenagers
  • life skills
  • volunteering
  • empathy
  • compassion
  • socially aware
  • responsible
  • interact
  • diverse backgrounds
  • cultural understanding
  • tolerance
  • work experience
  • essential skills
  • employment
  • interests
  • passions
  • career development
  • contribute
  • betterment
  • development
  • local community
  • mental well-being
  • stress
  • self-esteem
  • burden
  • academic
  • personal lives
  • time management
  • support
  • balance
  • participate
  • encouraged
  • numerous benefits
  • individuals
  • conclusion
What to do next:
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