We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is true that many
people
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living under
living
Correct article usage
a living
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standard
needs
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need
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our help worldwide nowadays. Some
people
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believe that we had better
to
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apply
show examples
give a hand to our nearby communities and own country rather than taking care of someone residing in
other
Fix the agreement mistake
another country
show examples
countries
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. In my opinion, I think we should take care of everyone if we can give
a
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apply
show examples
support
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regardless of their location. Needless to say, it is very seldom to witness anyone ignore the
people
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that needed
support
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from neighbouring to other provinces' fellowship. Whenever
people
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notice
about
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apply
show examples
any poorer
people
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suffering from their survival domestically,
for example
Linking Words
, they definitely raise the charity fund and share
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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to
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with
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the
needed
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needy
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people
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for their
recover
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recovery
show examples
. Many poor severe patients have recovered and returned to their daily life thanks to
such
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kind of
support
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. The more we give out, the more
people
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are being helped. It is even more better if we can help someone from
very
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a very
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far distant location or even from different geography,
particullarly
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particularly
those developed
countries
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supporting those developing
countries
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. In the modern days, we have seen a lot of
aids
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aid
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from the USA or
UK
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the UK
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or Europe to the poverty in Africa regarding
to
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apply
show examples
economy and health
issue
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issues
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. They cannot ignore the dire need that African
people
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cannot afford
such
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as food and vaccines which are no longer an issue in those rich
countries
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. It is recorded that over the past few decades,
due to
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the
support
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from 1st world
countries
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, many lives have been saved in Africa.
Thus
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, supporting borderless is much more important than anything else. In conclusion, if we only
support
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our
owned
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own
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people
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,
then
Linking Words
it may only help the domestic
people
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getting
Wrong verb form
get
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better, but it does not help to resolve the global issues. The more
people
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we can help, the better world we can build.
Submitted by nhp2610 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • global interconnectivity
  • international cooperation
  • ethics
  • moral obligation
  • geographical borders
  • diplomatic relations
  • economic stability
  • global security
  • resource allocation
  • expertise
  • international aid
  • dependency and development
  • sustainable solutions
  • local and global initiatives
  • community resilience
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