Some people think it is better for children to have many short holidays during the academic year. Others believe that it would be beneficial to have fewer and longer vacations for children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #holidays #year #vacations

The structure of school breaks is a debatable topic, some advocate for multiple short holidays and others believe that long breaks are essential and significantly increase students' interest in other activities.

This

essay aims to discuss both views and I will provide my opinion in regards to both statements.

To begin

with ,people who support short-term vacations, believe, it can provide folks to take time to do other short-duration activities. They can divert their mind from studies and can motivate themselves to participate in other programs.

For instance

, sports, dancing and singing competitions are available for children who want to explore their talent. It can

also

enhance their mind's ability to create their best efforts to do extracurricular work that can support building their social circle.

On the other hand

, supporters who trust in longer vacation duration contend that long-term holidays are more important and beneficial for students. It can provide ample time for children to engage in diverse activities beyond their academic commitments.

For example

, internships are meant to get practical experience in specific fields where forks can gain well-rounded educational knowledge rather than just reading books and theoretical stuff.

Moreover

, One can pursue their hobbies to gain opportunities to explore the world by working or getting training from different organisations.

However

, both views have their own merits and I believe with long-term vacations , a person can spend quality time with family and get to know about the external world where he can learn more skills. Short-term weekly breaks can make a person's mind stressless and free from all the school worries. In conclusion, deeper engagement in other interests can be possible through longer holidays

while

the development of social skills and family engagement can be achieved by shorter vacations.

Submitted by deekshadeeksha031994 on Fri Jun 30 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

292 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Music and other arts seem to be features of every society. In what ways are music and other arts important for societies and for individuals?
It is believed that music and other forms of art are essential products of individual society. This essay examines their significant roles in bringing educational opportunities to societies as well as promoting relaxation among people.
<4
band
Many major cities today are becoming bigger and more crowded. Why is this happening? What measures can be taken to solve this problem?
Nowadays, several urban areas are becoming bigger and more crowded due to the fact that governments invest more in big towns than rural areas. From my point of view, this issue can be solved whether leaders spend on small cities properly.
4
band
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
First of all, there is no doubt in my mind that this situation which teen adults have a great number of existence compared with olders' is more beneficial for the society. I would like to explain why young people are more important with my relevant examples.
6
band
Nowadays many poeple choose p be selfe-employed,rather than to work for a company or orgnasation. why might this be the case? what would be disadvantages of being self-employed?
These days, being self-employed is getting so popular among individuals. People like to work for themselves as being their own boss gives you a fulfilling feeling. Although working for your own provides variety of advantages, there are some drawbacks like more responsibility and stress because of more work load which should be considered.
4.5
band
discuss correlation technology and climate change for a better future
Firstly, technology is a paramount important tool to support people's activities either in school or at work. For instance, laptops and computers cannot be separated from students to help them improve their academics. However, these facilities have not been distributed to every student in Indonesia, especially in the lagging behind, leading, and frontier areas. Therefore, the government should consider paying attention to focusing on the equality of education.

Some people think it is better for children to have many short holidays during the academic year. Others believe that it would be beneficial to have fewer and longer vacations for children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Music and other arts seem to be features of every society. In what ways are music and other arts important for societies and for individuals?

Many major cities today are becoming bigger and more crowded. Why is this happening? What measures can be taken to solve this problem?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays many poeple choose p be selfe-employed,rather than to work for a company or orgnasation. why might this be the case? what would be disadvantages of being self-employed?

discuss correlation technology and climate change for a better future