Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people . To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievements #sets #people

These days the reason for celebrity fame lies in their money and lifestyle rather than their work and

this

is causing detrimental effects on our youth. I completely with the statement and

this

essay will explain the reasons. In

this

social media-dominated era, activities and lives of famous

people

are easily accessible to anyone, especially youngsters, which results in a desire to achieve those luxuries as well without realising the increasing cost of living.

For instance

, when these kids see their favourite actors or sports person using a specific brand of accessories

such

as a watch or sunglasses, they tend to copy them which results in a financial burden on parents.

In addition

, sometimes the clothes or attire these celebs carry is not acceptable for

people

from a particular religion.

However

, young

people

easily get influenced by celebrities from the Western world and start ignoring their religious and cultural values by adopting the same kind of immodest dressing .

As a result

this

damages the relationship between parents and children and creates immorality in certain conservative societies.

On the contrary

, these well-known

people

do share some motivational content regarding their career journeys but these are far less than their beautiful and extravagant materialistic things showcased on platforms

such

as Instagram.

For example

while

scrolling Instagram vast amount of content is available regarding styling videos or travel vlogs

whereas

there are very few ted talks for young

people

to take inspiration from . In conclusion, big names in society are damaging youth by setting unrealistic living standards

therefore

they should start behaving responsibly and encourage young

people

with their success stories to advance our society towards positive development .

Submitted by raha.filza100 on Sun Jul 02 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

278 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Topic Vocabulary:

glamour
wealth
achievements
portrayed
overshadow
influenced
lifestyles
unrealistic
expectations
values
promoting
hard work
perseverance
inspire
positive impact

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Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people . To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Are there any benefits of owning an electric car? saving fuel maintenance of the car cost of the car

An increasing number of larger shopping malls, areas and departmental stores are leading to the decline number of smaller corner shops. What are the advantages and disadvantages

Most developed countries spend a large proportion of their health budgets on expensive medical technology and procedures. This money should be spent instead on health education to keep people well. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

More and more people are shifting to cities from countryside. State solution to the problem