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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think it is better for children to grow up in the city, while others think that life in the countryside is more suitable. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places?

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People hold distinctive opinions regarding a debate which is linked to whether a child needs to be raised in a city or in the countryside. Both of these options have merits and demerits, which I will elaborate on in
this
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 essay. The primary advantage of living in urban areas is that
children
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 have a chance to be aware of their abilities. There are many facilities in
cities
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such
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 as art, music, sports, technology and so on. In light of
this
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 reality,
children
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 living in
cities
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 can try these facilities and choose what to do.
For example
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, thanks to it
children
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 may choose an occupation
that is
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 related to these facilities.
However
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, the biggest drawback of urban life is pollution and its long-term impact on the health of youngsters.
That is
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 to say, unfortunately, there is a growing number of asthma cases in
children
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 living in metropolitan
cities
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.
On the other hand
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, the main benefit of living in the countryside is that families have a chance to allocate enough time for their
children
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.
Furthermore
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,
children
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 have a harmonious family life and they get on well with their peers.
Due to
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this
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 reason, when they grow up, they have healthy relationships in many areas like business.
However
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, rural areas in general, do not have a university, which limits the student’s learning and development. They have to move to the
cities
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 if they want to pursue higher education or take professional courses
such
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 as medicine or engineering.
To conclude
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,
children
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 growing up in
cities
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 or the countryside have their own advantages and disadvantages.
While
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cities
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 can provide a superior living standard, it comes with a cost of health degradation.
On the other hand
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, rural life provides
children
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 with healthy family ties,
however
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, higher education is not possible there.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main point and provide clear topic sentences to guide the reader.
coherence cohesion
Provide a stronger introduction and conclusion that clearly states your position on the topic and summarizes your main points.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using more varied and precise words and phrases.
grammatical range
Pay attention to the use of grammatical structures and make sure to use complex and varied sentences throughout the essay.
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