IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#children #difference #right #age #punishment #distinction
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The line graph illustrates the figure for passenger railway journeys made in Great Britain from 1950 to 2004.
Overall
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,
It is clear that
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 the trends of all three networks are upward with the most striking feature being the similarity between the National
rail
Use synonyms
network
Use synonyms
 and the London Underground. Starting from one billion passengers using the National
rail
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network
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 in 1950,
this
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 figure rose slightly to a peak of about 1.1 billion just before 1960, before dropping consistently to reach the lowest level of 600
million
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 in 1980.
By contrast
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, the number of people who used the London Underground in the 1950s was only
two thirds
Add a hyphen
two-thirds
show examples
 of those taking
national
Correct article usage
the national
show examples
rail
Use synonyms
network
Use synonyms
, with about 750
million
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.
After
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this
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,
this
Linking Words
 number remained stable for the next 20 years, followed by a gradual decrease to a low of 500
million
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 in around 1985.
However
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, the next several years experienced a rapid increase in passenger numbers of
London
Correct article usage
the London
show examples
 underground, to equal those using
national
Correct article usage
the national
show examples
rail
Use synonyms
network
Use synonyms
.
Thereafter
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, both followed a very similar pattern as they showed an upward trend towards the billion passenger mark until 2004/05, with the 1980s and the early 2000s seeing the sharpest increase.
On the other hand
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, after their introduction in the 1960s, the light railway and metro systems carried fewer passengers than the other two networks, no more than around ten
million
Use synonyms
 over the first 15 years.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, in the 1980s, there was a marginal increase in the number of journeys made by passengers, reaching nearly 200
million
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 in 2004/05.
Submitted by vincentyu on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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