IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Do you think that technological advancement has brought more harm than good? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

#advancement #harm #support
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Nowadays, advances in technology have brought significant benefits to mankind.
However
, they
also
 pose negative impacts
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 them. Personally, I absolutely agree with
this
 viewpoint, which will be
further
 discussed in the following essay. On the one hand, technological advancements have played a huge role in changing the way we communicate for the better. To be specific, thanks to the invention of the Internet and social platforms,
people
 can now stay updated with current affairs and their loved one’s events faster than ever before.
In addition
, they can even see each other more regularly through chatting and video calling, just with a press of a button.
Secondly
, technology has paved the way for automation, which has greatly reduced labour work and improved productivity. To illustrate, centuries ago, most goods were made by hand, which may require labour force and time, nowadays many manufacturers have taken advantage of automatic machines to mass produce products with consistent quality and in a relatively short time.
As a result
, not only has the workload can be done faster and more effectively, but the quality of life has
also
 been improved.
On the other hand
, there are
also
 drawbacks of technological advances worth mentioning. The first and most obvious is the decline in job demands. Indeed, with so many tasks that can be computerized these days, companies no longer need human programmers to do the work, which results in thousands of
people
 being fired in order to cut down the cost. What is more, the advancements of artificial intelligence
also
 replace jobs that previously only humans can do
such
 as writing advertisements and designing graphics. Of equal severity, the lack of face-to-face communication is
also
 one of technology's negative impacts. Having seen each other on social apps already,
people
 become more hesitant to meet physically. Some teenagers even want to have virtual friends more than mix with their real-life ones. In the long run,
this
 can lead to a serious decrease in social interactions
as well as
 communication skills
as well as
 characteristics
such
 as empathy and mindfulness.
As a consequence
,
people
 will end up being emotionless and lacking genuine relationships, which can be extremely harmful to the well-being of human society. In conclusion,
while
 it is true that technological advances have brought numerous benefits to human lives, I
also
 agree that the consequences
along with
 them are considerable.
Submitted by vinhduong010103 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Economic growth
  • Job automation
  • Artificial intelligence
  • Productivity
  • Job displacement
  • Unemployment
  • Diagnostic tools
  • Patient care
  • Privacy
  • Data security
  • Genetic modification
  • Renewable energy
  • Resource efficiency
  • Electronic waste
  • Carbon footprint
  • Pollution
  • Social media
  • Cyberbullying
  • Digital addiction
  • Digital divide
  • Misinformation
  • Democratized access
  • Face-to-face interactions
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