Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Serious social problems can appear to the surface when move to a new place that
have
Change the verb form
has
different
Add an article
a different
language
and you should to
talk a foreign Change the verb form
apply
language
, as well as
practical problems. In my perspective, I totally agree in this
case, since language
is a method to communicate with others.
In the beginning, to be succesfull
in society, good communication has a vital role Correct your spelling
successful
to make
it come true, which is Change preposition
in making
language
being the Add an article
the language
a language
flourish
way Change the verb form
flourishing
on
that. Fully understanding, what people talking about, can help to deliver our own opinion Change preposition
apply
while
a person who do
not understand the topic has Change the verb form
does
severe
condition to express Add an article
the severe
a severe
theirself
. International students, Correct your spelling
themselves
for instance
, have to know what the lecturers discuss about material and task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
,
if they want to reach a good grade. Remove the comma
apply
In addition
, Not only are learning in university, but also
they must to interacting
with local people when Change preposition
interact
purchase
something like Change the verb form
purchasing
accomodations
, Correct your spelling
accommodation
baverages
, and Correct your spelling
beverages
foods
which can lead to Fix the agreement mistake
food
the
higher price if they cannot deal with Correct article usage
a
native
tongue.
Correct pronoun usage
their native
Moreover
, an individual who cannot interact in community
leads to detrimental effects. Add an article
the community
a community
According to
World
Health Organization (2023), the main mental disaster of moving Correct article usage
the World
on
a new place is coming from Change preposition
to
inability
to use Add an article
the inability
native
Correct article usage
the native
language
, causing less confident
and isolation. These are the first Replace the word
confidence
sympton
of Correct your spelling
symptom
symptoms
stressful
which Replace the word
stress
impacting to
performance in Wrong verb form
impact
company
or university. Correct article usage
a company
Finally
, adjusting in speech is eminent
skill that can diminish the negative effects and Correct word choice
an important
also
learning the language
before going abroad is the best preparation.
To sum up
, language
is a gate to success in a new country, in terms of Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
relationship
in every environment. I believeFix the agreement mistake
relationships
,
Remove the comma
apply
this
is a reason of regulation why each individual has had basic qualified in speech before going abroad.Submitted by misstiasclassroom on
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task achievement
Your essay does not fully address the prompt as it leans only towards agreement without examining counterarguments or the extent of agreement, leading to a limited task response.
task achievement
Points made in the essay are somewhat repetitive and not clearly developed. You should aim to expand upon your ideas and present varied reasons or examples to support your argument.
task achievement
The use of specific examples is limited and not particularly effective in illustrating your points. Try referencing more detailed and relevant instances or studies to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has an identifiable structure, but transitions between points can be smoother, and the logical flow can be improved by consistently connecting ideas from sentence to sentence.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be enhanced to more effectively preview and summarize the main points of the essay.
coherence cohesion
You should focus on supporting your main points more effectively by clearly explaining how they relate to the topic and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear central idea.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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