TOO MANY OLD HISTORIC BUILDINGS ARE IN DANGER AND DESTROYED IN MANY COUNTRIES. WHAT ARE THE MAIN REASON? HOW TO PROTECT THEM?

#buildings #danger #countries #reason

It has been always an issue how to preserve old heritage sites because it is pivotal to convey culture to the next generations.

This

essay will explain the main causes of the destruction of old cultural

buildings

and provide potential solutions. The first cause is an environmental problem called

acid

rain

This

phenomenon occurs because

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

rain

absorbs

acid

substances emitted by harmful gases. It can be fatal for old

buildings

because they are easily eroded.

For instance

, historic statues and churches in Germany are damaged and their colour is changed by

acid

rain

Secondly

, there is always the risk of

fire

accidents.

This

is because most historic

buildings

do not have an effective structure to deal with

fire

. In fact, it is famous that the Saint Notre Dame Church in Paris was lost because of a

fire

accident. By solving those two causes we can prevent the loss of heritage sites.

Firstly

, industries and the

government

should tackle the emission of gasses that give birth to

acid

rain

. Those gasses are often made by the excessive use of petrol and coal to make

steal

Correct your spelling

steel

show examples

or energy.

Therefore

, the

government

should encourage the use of sustainable resources using subsidies and penalties.

Secondly

, the

government

should endeavour to prevent

fire

accidents.

For example

, it should enforce the structure of heritage sites or build

fire

stations near them. In conclusion, historic

buildings

can be easily damaged by environmental dangers and accidents. In order to preserve them, the

government

should tackle the route problem of

acid

rains and reinforce the

buildings

Submitted by leokuwayama03 on Fri Jul 07 2023

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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TOO MANY OLD HISTORIC BUILDINGS ARE IN DANGER AND DESTROYED IN MANY COUNTRIES. WHAT ARE THE MAIN REASON? HOW TO PROTECT THEM?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish.

Celebrities are usually famous for glamour and wealth rather than their achievements. Some say taking them as an example can be dangerous for young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some people think that student in single-sex schools perform better academically. Others, however, believes that mixed schools provide children with better social skills for adults life. Discuss both of these views and give your opinion.

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.