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Writing Samples
Band 7

The bar graph compares the percentage of university education among youths in six different countries between 2000 and 2007.

The bar graph compares the percentage of university education among youths in six different countries between 2000 and 2007.
The given chart illustrates the data of young people attending universities in 6 different countries namely Italy,
Spain
Use synonyms
, the UK,
Poland
Use synonyms
, Norway and Finland from 2000 to 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen that
Poland
Use synonyms
 attracted more students than any other nation over the period,
while
Linking Words
 Italy and
Spain
Use synonyms
's education centres became the lowest attraction in 2000 and 2007 respectively. In the year 2000, 78% of the total studied in
Poland
Use synonyms
 universities, the highest number of all time. Finland hit the second position by providing 70 % of seats to young adults in their colleges and Norway followed the trend by reaching 66 pupils. In
Spain
Use synonyms
and
Correct word choice
apply
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,
British
Correct article usage
the British
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 the percentage was noticed similar in their institutes,
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
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at
Change preposition
for
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 46,%
whereas
Linking Words
 Italy remained the lowest with only 38% of students. Moving toward 2007,Finland remained successful to attract more people for higher education peaking at 70%, which is
then
Linking Words
 followed by Norway and
Poland
Use synonyms
 with 66% and 64% respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, a noticeable growth can be seen in Italy graduates ,where the number changed from 38% to 52%. On the opposite, a downward trend is observed in
Spain
Use synonyms
, when admission got decreased by 5%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words spain, poland with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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