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Some parents buy their kids a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages of a child having a large number of toys?

#parents #kids #toys #child
It is true that some individuals purchase their children plenty of things to play with. The main benefits of buying all these
toys
 are economic increase and the idea of making their children happy. The main drawbacks are plastic pollution, the production of plastic
toys
 contributes to greenhouse gas emissions and after they are no longer being used, they frequently end up in oceans. First and foremost, one primary advantage for toy stores is the possibility of making money easily, since the fact that children’s
toys
 can be truly expensive for several reasons,
such
 as the cost of materials and manufacturing processes, branding and numerous other things. The idea of making our juveniles happy and purchasing them whatever they want is another advantage, as they help them to develop
through
Change preposition
in
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 different ways,
for instance
, diverse
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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 of
toys
 can boost creativity,
motor
Correct word choice
and motor
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 and linguistic skills. These abilities can positively impact
on
Change preposition
apply
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the way they grow up.
On the other hand
, disadvantages are way more dangerous for
Add an article
the earth
show examples
earth
Capitalize word
Earth
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 and we have to take them into account.
For example
, the production of plastic items contributes to harmful gas emissions and a huge part of them are thrown away in oceans. Despite the fact that many
toys
 can be indeed helpful for various positive skills, having an excessive number of them can lead to a major disadvantage,
in other words
, children may struggle to focus on a particular play activity.
To sum up
, even though we have many advantages that contribute to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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achievement as a person from a quite young age, as well we
plenty
Add a missing verb
have plenty
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 of disadvantages, so we should be careful with our wishes and
thinking
Wrong verb form
think
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 about
consequences
Correct article usage
the consequences
show examples
 at the same time.
Submitted by acaitaz on

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coherence cohesion
To enhance your essay's coherence and cohesion, focus on using a variety of linking phrases to clearly connect ideas within and between paragraphs. Additionally, consider organizing your points in a more structured manner, with clear topic sentences that introduce each paragraph's main idea.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your introduction and conclusion are more clearly defined. The introduction should succinctly state the topic and outline the advantages and disadvantages you will discuss. The conclusion should effectively summarize your main points and restate the overall balance of advantages and disadvantages.
task achievement
Support your main points with specific examples. This essay would benefit from real-life illustrations or statistical data that exemplify the advantages and disadvantages of children having a large number of toys.
task achievement
Work on fully addressing the task by expanding on both the advantages and disadvantages equally, ensuring that you give a detailed and well-rounded discussion of the topic. Use the prompt's wording to guide your response and keep it directly relevant.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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