one of the consequences of the medical care is that people are living longer and expentensy is increasing Do you think this advantage of development overwieghts the disadvantage?

#consequences #care #people #expentensy #advantage #development #overwieghts

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Progress in technological advancement has risen dramatically and proven to be a positive development ,especially in the aspect of healthcare.

This

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innovation in medical cure is making citizens grow

long

Rephrase

longer

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and their expectancy

enhancing

Verb problem

apply

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However

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this

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is a good factor but still has drawbacks and I will discuss it and give my opinion. On the one hand, healthcare hospitalization has advanced and the treatment of older

people

Use synonyms

has broadened the knowledge of medical professionals and researchers to solve problems associated with old age.

People

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are always on the edge to learn new things about gerontological care and

this

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is a positive step in the medical profession.

Furthermore

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, new

treatments plan

Fix the agreement mistake

treatment plans

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evolves

Correct subject-verb agreement

evolve

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and help the saving of lives.

For instance

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, treatment for heart plants, cancer, diabetes etc. Doctors, specialists and nurses are always looking forward to being trained to undertake these surgeries to help save the public that may need organs to live and

this

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is one enormous benefit for the medical community since they're able to save the lives of critically ill patients.

On the other hand

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, the aspect of long age brings about some drawbacks.

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, it increases the rate of dependency ratio between family and government.

For example

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, there is old age equipment like walking aids, massage machines and other tools these

people

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need and the government needs to provide them every year to support them. Government always have to pay extra money on their pension salaries and

this

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leads to an economic crisis since we will have a lot of older

people

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living.

Secondly

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, we all know older folks need extra care and when the number increases it leads to neglect on their part. In conclusion, there are always two sides to a coin and

this

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topic is no exception. Healthcare advancements bring about new treatment plans for medical professionals and

also

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broaden the scope of medical research. In my opinion, the benefits of

people

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living longer are indeed far greater than the disadvantages discussed.

Submitted by dede on Mon Jul 10 2023

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Task Response

Ensure that the essay fully addresses all aspects of the question in a comprehensive manner, providing a clear opinion.

Coherence and Cohesion

Maintain consistency and coherence in the logical structure of the essay, with a well-organized introduction and conclusion.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

327 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

life expectancy
public health
medical technology
vaccinations
antibiotics
senior health care
geriatric services
overpopulation
natural resources
environmental strain
dependency ratio
working-age population
retirees
contribute to society
personal goals
medical industry
economic growth
age-related diseases
health care costs
health care system

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one of the consequences of the medical care is that people are living longer and expentensy is increasing Do you think this advantage of development overwieghts the disadvantage?

Many countries offer a free health care system to their citizens rather than relying on private health care. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of having a free system, and give your opinion. Write at least 250 words.

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Students should pay the full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

ome families send their children to a foreign country to be educated. Discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of this course of action. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.