The graph below compares the number of visits to two new music sites on the web.

this

Linking Words

graph

Add a comma

,graph

show examples

we can see people's choices among two new

music

Use synonyms

sites

Change preposition

show examples

the web. Despite,

this

Linking Words

only

shows

Wrong verb form

showing

show examples

a short

peorid

Correct your spelling

period

of time which is 15

days

Use synonyms

, there are some serious changes here. Between

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

days

Use synonyms

Add a comma

,11

show examples

Music

Use synonyms

choice

Use synonyms

is much more visitable than

Pop

Use synonyms

Parade

Use synonyms

. Actually, when you look at the graph you can say that

Music

Use synonyms

Choice

Use synonyms

is mostly preferred by the people.

Pop

Use synonyms

Parade

Use synonyms

made a poor start to the 15days period. But between the

days

Use synonyms

12-15 results

arent

Correct your spelling

aren't

show examples

that bad for them. When you look at

Music

Use synonyms

Choice

Use synonyms

's visits, you will see perfect starts

except

Add the preposition

forexcept

show examples

few

days

Use synonyms

. The most visiting record belongs to

Music

Use synonyms

Choice

Use synonyms

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

day 15 with 18000 people. And the least visiting record belongs to

Pop

Use synonyms

Parade

Use synonyms

on the

Use synonyms

days

Fix the agreement mistake

day

show examples

4 which

isnt

Correct your spelling

isn't

very surprising.

Pop

Use synonyms

Parade

Use synonyms

is more visited on only 2

days

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

shows

dominance

Add an article

the dominance

a dominance

show examples

Music

Use synonyms

choice

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

conclusion, we can say that

Music

Use synonyms

Choice

Use synonyms

's stats are much better

tukezaliyeva96

Jul 11, 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Add some linking words.

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Linking words: Add more linking words.

▼

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words music, days, choice, pop, parade with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.

▼

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1
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

163 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Comparison
Number of visits
Trends
Period
Increases
Decreases
Stability
Factors
Influenced
Marketing strategies
User interface
Variety of music
Peak times
Reasons
Promotional events
Long-term sustainability
Growth prospects
Graph

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The graph below compares the number of visits to two new music sites on the web.

Some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that government should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that when recruiting,companies should aim to take on people who are innovative and able to work independetly while others consider they should recruit people who are able to work in a team and follow instructions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There are severe social consequences to housing shortages in cities and only the government can solve these problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the extened family is not as important as it once was. Others think that its worth has not changed because people always need help from their family members. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.