IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people think that it s better to impose higher taxes on unhealthy food, while other disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #taxes #food
According
Add the preposition
toAccording
show examples
, to me, putting higher taxes on unhealthy food will not
reduces
Change the verb form
reduce
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people from eating junk food. If a government will impose more
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
 on unhealthy food
then
 it will great impact on poor
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people. My viewpoint is discussed below.
Firstly
,
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people should be
be
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
aware
about
Change the preposition
of
show examples
 how junk snack is
spoing
Correct your spelling
spoiling
spring
 our health.
Form
Correct your spelling
From
show examples
 the viewpoint of
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
society
if's
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 better to impose more tax
this
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 two sides good
as well as
 bad.
Good
Add an article
The good
show examples
 side is that
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
society will eat less unhealthy.
Bad
Add an article
The bad
show examples
 side is that the poor
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
society can not buy expensive drinks.
For example
, If a poor person
want
Change the verb form
wants
show examples
 to go to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
hotel
then
 he can not
affort
Correct your spelling
afford
effort
 the rate of
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
 place so, it's
Add an article
a disadvantage
show examples
disadvantage
Replace the word
disadvantageous
show examples
 for those.
By making
Change preposition
Making
show examples
 a country aware
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
how to take care
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
of body health can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
improve
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
a groups
Correct the article-noun agreement
a group
groups
show examples
.
Secondly
,
this
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 even two impacts on
Add an article
the shop
show examples
shop
Fix the agreement mistake
shops
show examples
as well as
 good and bad. The benefits are as a community will buy less
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 will be helpful for the nation body but on another
side
Add a comma
,side
show examples
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
show examples
 will be
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
loss
Correct article usage
a loss
show examples
 by paying
mush
Correct your spelling
much
show examples
 more to
Correct article usage
the
show examples
governments.
For example
, Suppose if
rate
Add an article
the rate
show examples
 of drinks
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is less healthy but
price
Add an article
the price
show examples
 will be low
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 population will buy more and more.
However
, if
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
ask
Change the verb form
asks
show examples
 for more tax from a shop
then
rich
Correct article usage
the rich
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
population will
able
Add a missing verb
be able
show examples
 to buy. In conclusion,
according to
 me higher taxes should
be apply
Change the verb form
be applied
show examples
 to those who are coming in 6 stars hotel lists.
Submitted by purvametaliya99  on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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