Many feel that the common educational system of teachers and students in a classroom will be replaced by the year 2050. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

#system #teachers #students #classroom #year

Many think that the traditional

education

system of teachers and pupils in a classroom will be replaced by the year 2050. I totally agree with

this

statement because I believe

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online learning will replace

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

mainstream

education

due to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

e-learing

Correct your spelling

e-learning

is economical for the

government

as well as

students, and

also

eliminate

Change the verb form

eliminates

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

bullying in classrooms.

To begin

with, there are several reasons why I believe that

remotely

Change the word

remote

show examples

learning will replace

common

Add an article

the common

show examples

way of

education

by the year 2050. The primary reason

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online learning is inexpensive

copmared

Correct your spelling

compared

with traditional

education

This

is because the

government

do not need to

funding

Change the verb

fund

show examples

education

Correct article usage

the education

show examples

sector

such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

building

school

Correct word choice

and maintenance

show examples

maintenance

Replace the word

maintaining

show examples

school

, which

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can make the reduce financial burden

Change preposition

show examples

the public budget.

Consequently

, the

government

could use

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

funds to tackle crucial issues namely, climate change, global warming, and pollution.

Furthermore

e -learning

Add a hyphen

e-learning

show examples

is affordable for students compared to mainstream

education

The

Correct your spelling

This

show examples

is due

the

Change preposition

to the

show examples

fact that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

children will pay

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

fees to

school

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because online

courses

Add a verb

courses are

courses were

show examples

often less expensive than

attend

Wrong verb form

attending

show examples

school

physically .

Moreover

, eliminating bullying is another

reasons

Replace the adjective

reason

show examples

why I believe

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

electronic -learning will replace the common way of

education

by the year 2050. To illustrate, children do not

make

Verb problem

have

show examples

face-to-face interaction with peer, which make children

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

less vulnerable to

expoture

Correct your spelling

exposure

to bullying against clothes, face,

culture

Correct word choice

and culture

show examples

Therefore

, I

belive

Correct your spelling

believe

show examples

Correct word choice

that in

show examples

future

Correct article usage

the future

show examples

many governments will adopt online learning

instead

of traditional

education

, because

onlnie learing

Correct your spelling

online learning

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

show examples

positive

Add an article

a positive

show examples

environment without discrimination, which

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can contribute to

enhance

Change the verb form

enhancing

show examples

the performance of pupils.

To sum up

, I strongly believe in future the mainstream

education

will

replace

Wrong verb form

be replaced

show examples

by online learning

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because online learning is economical for the

government

as well as

pupils, and it

provide

Change the verb form

provides

show examples

positive

Add an article

a positive

show examples

environment for students.

Submitted by faiz3177 on Fri Jul 14 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear logical structure. The points are not developed in a coherent manner, making the essay difficult to follow.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present, but they lack clarity and strength. The introduction does not clearly state the writer's position, and the conclusion does not effectively summarize the main points.

coherence cohesion

The main points are weakly supported, and the examples provided are not effectively developed or explained. More detailed and relevant examples are needed to support the main points.

task achievement

The essay provides a partial response to the task. Some relevant points are discussed, but the arguments lack depth and are not fully developed.

task achievement

Some relevant ideas are presented, but the lack of depth and development weakens the overall coherence and clarity of the essay.

task achievement

The examples provided are somewhat relevant but lack detailed explanation and analysis. More substantial examples are needed to fully support the writer's position.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
44Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

295 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

artificial intelligence (AI)
machine learning
online learning platforms
virtual reality (VR)
personalized AI tutors
tailored educational experiences
human interaction
mentor
inspire
psychological needs
group discussions
teamwork
social aspects of learning
critical life skills
digital-only format
hybrid model
educational accessibility
personalization
facilitating learning
curiosity
innovation

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Many feel that the common educational system of teachers and students in a classroom will be replaced by the year 2050. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The best way to reduce the number of traffic accidents is to raise the age limit for younger drivers and to lower the age limit for aged drivers. Do you agree ?

Some believe that money for education should mainly be spent on better computers while others believe it would be better spent on teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some educational systems make students study specialised subjects while others require students to study a wide range. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

The best way to make roads safer is to make vehicle drivers take a driving test each year To what extent do you agree or disagree