IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The given bar graph shows the main sources of energy for USA in 1980 and 1990. Write a report for a university lecturer making comparisons where relevant and reporting the main features.

The given bar graph shows the main sources of energy for USA in 1980 and 1990. Write a report for a university lecturer making comparisons where relevant and reporting the main features.
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The given pie charts compare the significant energy sources in the USA between the years 1980 and 1990.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 oil and natural gas sources decreased,
while
Linking Words
 coal and nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 increased from 1980 to 1990.
By contrast
Linking Words
, it is interesting to note that hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 remained at the same level over the same decade shown. Looking at the pie charts in more detail,
oil
Correct article usage
the oil
show examples
 source of
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 fell noticeably from 42% to 33%. Despite the fact that there was not any critical decrease,
however
Linking Words
, the proportion of natural gas witnessed
1
Correct article usage
a 1
show examples
% drop from 1980 to 1990. The ratio for hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 was stable at 5%
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the same period shown. It could be
explain
Wrong verb form
explained
show examples
the
Change preposition
by the
show examples
 fact that the sources of coal and nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 increased equally (5%).
In particular
Linking Words
, the percentage of coal grew from 22% to 27%. The level of nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 source raised two times from 5% to 10%.
Submitted by mr.mehdiyevkamran on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words power with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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