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Band 6

Beside a lot of advantages some people believe that the internet creates many problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #internet
Some
people
 believe that
advanced
Correct article usage
the advanced
show examples
internet
 has several benefits to the community whilst others opine that the adverse
effects
 created by the
internet
 are more as compared to advantages.
While
 I understand
people
's concern about
internet
effects
 ,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 still believe that the
internet
 has brought some great positive changes in everyday life. There are multiple reasons why individuals support that the
internet
 has negative impacts.
Firstly
, they believe that the
internet
 is harmful to children . To clarify, most individuals think that the
internet
 is a platform where children can learn negative content
such
 as violence and crime. There is a reason behind
this
 thinking which is the availability of unlocked or open content for everyone without any age restriction.
Secondly
 , advanced technology leads individuals to a sedentary lifestyle because of
this
people
 are more prone to serious health issues.
For instance
, most
people
 use the
internet
 in their leisure time as compared to doing some physical activities for good health
therefore
 less physical activity leads to an unhealthy lifestyle . These points make
people
 believe that the
internet
 has
a harmful
Correct the article-noun agreement
harmful effects
a harmful effect
show examples
effects
. Despite the arguments mentioned above
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 still consider the
internet
 has brought some positive
effects
 because of potential reasons. The prime reason is the easy and convenient lifestyle.
For example
 , with the help of
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
Internet
Add a comma
,Internet
show examples
 we can do some difficult tasks in a few seconds. The most significant example is the printer because we are able to print
a
Change the article
an
show examples
oflot
Correct your spelling
of lot
 copies of one document in a few minutes with the help of an
internet
 connection.
In addition
 to
this
 , the
internet
 makes communication too advanced and easy to access for everyone. To
examplify
Correct your spelling
exemplify
, video call is a great invention of the
internet
 world because it makes long-distance relationships strong and stable. These are the reasons behind my point of view. In conclusion,
although
people
 side with the fact that the
internet
 has a lot of drawbacks, I believe that positives are wat to more potent.
Submitted by maninderkhosa046 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • E-commerce
  • Consumer behavior
  • Virtual marketplace
  • Cybersecurity
  • Digital footprint
  • Return policy
  • Comparison shopping
  • Customer reviews
  • Retail therapy
  • Logistics
  • User interface
  • Payment gateway
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