Some believe that violent computer games are just a form of entertainment, while others think they lead directly to violent behavior. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some argue that playing war and gun

games

Use synonyms

on PC is only a type of fun,

although

Linking Words

others consider that it can influence people and cause violent attitudes.

While

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such

Linking Words

games

Use synonyms

may create violent behaviour because of their environment, I believe that these

games

Use synonyms

are played to spend time interestingly and are just a form of entertainment. On the one hand, violent video

games

Use synonyms

are thought to be the main reason for the creation of violent attitudes.

In other words

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, human beings who play them may be influenced by game characters and may try to imitate them in life, which in turn results in a violent attitude.

For example

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, in Turkey, the young generation who watch violent films try to emulate the behaviours of characters with their friends. These

games

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are likely to influence human beings;

however

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, I think that it is most likely depend on individuals' attitudes.

On the other hand

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, these digital

games

Use synonyms

are considered a source of entertainment by some, and they play those

games

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to make their free time exciting.

This

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is to say that these human beings play these online gun or combat

games

Use synonyms

with their friends to spend time together.

For instance

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, many youngsters and matures connect with their friends to play Pubg, and they try to improve their ranks in order to make their times

funny

Correct word choice

fun

show examples

Therefore

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, I believe that these

games

Use synonyms

are just a kind of entertainment, and provide an opportunity for the community to have fun when they are bored. In conclusion, despite these violent

games

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affecting and contributing to violent attitude

Change preposition

show examples

people, I think that it is just for fun, and help people make their entertaining times.

murad.tariverdiyev2005Tue Jul 18 2023

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task response

Ensure that all parts of the essay directly address the task prompt. Provide a more balanced discussion of both views in the essay to fully address the task prompt.

coherence and cohesion

Work on organizing ideas in a more coherent manner. Use transition words and phrases to connect ideas for better coherence and cohesion.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

278 words

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Some believe that violent computer games are just a form of entertainment, while others think they lead directly to violent behavior. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other s think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own oipinion.

Eco-tourism usually involves people visiting remote areas. Some people think this will have a negative impact on local cultures and communities. What problems can result from eco-tourism? What measures can be taken to protect local culture and communities?