๐ˆ๐ญ ๐ข๐ฌ ๐ฌ๐จ๐ฆ๐ž๐ญ๐ข๐ฆ๐ž๐ฌ ๐ฉ๐จ๐ฌ๐ฌ๐ข๐›๐ฅ๐ž ๐ญ๐จ ๐ฉ๐š๐ฒ ๐ฌ๐จ๐ฆ๐ž๐›๐จ๐๐ฒ ๐ญ๐จ ๐๐จ ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง๐ ๐ฌ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐๐จ๐งโ€™๐ญ ๐ฐ๐š๐ง๐ญ ๐ญ๐จ ๐๐จ, ๐จ๐ซ ๐๐จ๐งโ€™๐ญ ๐ก๐š๐ฏ๐ž ๐ญ๐ข๐ฆ๐ž ๐ญ๐จ ๐๐จ, ๐Ÿ๐จ๐ซ ๐ž๐ฑ๐š๐ฆ๐ฉ๐ฅ๐ž, ๐ก๐จ๐ฎ๐ฌ๐ž๐ก๐จ๐ฅ๐ ๐œ๐ก๐จ๐ซ๐ž๐ฌ ๐จ๐ซ ๐ฅ๐จ๐จ๐ค๐ข๐ง๐  ๐š๐Ÿ๐ญ๐ž๐ซ ๐œ๐ก๐ข๐ฅ๐๐ซ๐ž๐ง. ๐ˆ๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ฌ ๐š ๐ ๐จ๐จ๐ ๐ฐ๐š๐ฒ ๐จ๐Ÿ ๐ฉ๐ซ๐จ๐ฏ๐ข๐๐ข๐ง๐  ๐ฐ๐จ๐ซ๐ค ๐Ÿ๐จ๐ซ ๐จ๐ญ๐ก๐ž๐ซ๐ฌ? ๐’๐ก๐จ๐ฎ๐ฅ๐ ๐ฉ๐ž๐จ๐ฉ๐ฅ๐ž ๐๐จ ๐ญ๐ก๐ž๐ฌ๐ž ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง๐ ๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ก๐ž๐ฆ๐ฌ๐ž๐ฅ๐ฏ๐ž๐ฌ?

โœจ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays,
people
Use synonyms
are so busy in their lives, that they tend to hire individuals to complete some of their basic
tasks
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. For a society, these practices have their merits
as well as
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demerits. Some
people
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believe it is beneficial for the community as more jobs are generated on the other side, we're becoming more dependent on others to fulfil common household chores. Personally, I stand against
this
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idea of anyone performing my duties especially, if
that is
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babysitting the children. Let us discuss
this
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further
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in detail. When
people
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rely on others, for basic
tasks
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like cooking, cleaning, driving, and babysitting, they will always have difficulties when they have to deal with those
tasks
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by themselves.
For example
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, during the pandemic, many individuals suffered because they lacked common household skills, and were always reliant on others to finish
tasks
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. Everyone was told by the government to stay at home and the movement of outsiders was highly restricted. Children learn a lot from their parents, and they always crave their parent's attention. When their upbringing is done by daycares or babysitters, they will never have a strong bond with their family.
Also
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, in recent news by CNN, a child was physically abused by the servent in the absence of parents.
Such
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incidents can create
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
trauma or a life-threatening situation for the child. In conclusion, with the busy lifestyle
people
Use synonyms
are outsourcing their basic household work, which is causing many issues like, a lack of necessary skills, and weaker bonds with their children. We should work on not being dependent on anyone, and take time to learn the skills and adapt in our lives.
Submitted by bhat.shweta17 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure your essay arguments are clearly structured around the main points of the question. This will improve the logical flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to deepen the exploration of counterarguments to strengthen the coherence of your essay.
Task Achievement
Expand on your arguments by providing more specific examples to illustrate your points clearly. This will enhance the comprehension and depth of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion is succinct but try to reiterate the main points discussed in your essay for more impact.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your arguments well.
Task Achievement
You provided a relevant example from the COVID-19 pandemic, which made your argument more relatable and concrete.
Task Achievement
Insightful points about dependency on others and its implications on skills and family bonds.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • bilingual
  • multilingual
  • fluency
  • communicate
  • cognitive skills
  • cultural awareness
  • opportunities
  • globalized world
  • job market
  • interact
  • linguistic abilities
  • cultural exchange
  • language proficiency
  • language barrier
  • foreign travel
  • personal growth
  • academic achievement
  • self-confidence
  • enhance
  • cross-cultural communication
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