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Band 4

Some people believe that air travelshould be restricted because it causes serious pollution and up the world's fuel resources. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #air #travelshould #pollution #world #fuel #resources
It has always been argued that travelling by aeroplane ought to be banned as it creates pollution and consumes more fossil fuels. I totally disagree with
this
given
Verb problem
apply
show examples
statement and
this
 essay shall shed light upon my perspective in the subsequent paragraphs
along with
 a reasoned conclusion. Foremost, the fundamental reason behind my disagreement is that nowadays, the majority of people prefer to travel by aeroplane as it saves
time
 for travelling, so it is important for each and every person because they may spend their
time
 on other essential work.
For instance
, a survey conducted by Harward University revealed that around the globe air
travelling
Replace the word
travel
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 is popular among the population as it takes less
time
 to reach any particular place than other transportation.
Besides
this
, growth in the economy of nations. If people travel by aeroplane to the foreign countries
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 explore the different types of locations, the region may earn huge amounts of capital where people would prefer to go there.
Fie
Correct your spelling
For
show examples
 example, an article published by The Tribune newspaper showed that Thailand is
developing
Correct article usage
a developing
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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country with the assistance of air travelling as there are more tourist spots available.
Hence
, it is fruitful for the country's improvement.
To conclude
,
although
 air
travelling
Replace the word
travel
show examples
puts
Verb problem
has
show examples
 an adverse on the atmosphere because it creates pollution, there are a few advantages it
is not save
Change the verb form
does not save
show examples
time
 but increases the economic rate.
Submitted by deepikanayyar1996 on

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task achievement
Make sure to address counterarguments to strengthen the essay. Recognizing opposing views, even if you don't agree with them, can make your argument more well-rounded.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas could be presented in a more logically structured manner. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next and maintains a clear flow of ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay and restates your position clearly.
task achievement
You've provided specific examples to support your points, which adds depth to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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