IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You are soon going to spend three months doing work experience in an organisation. Write a letter to the manager of the organisation where you are going to do work experience. In your letter thank the manager for the opportunity to do work experience explain what you hope to learn from the work experience . ask some questions about the work experience you are going to do

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am delighted to hear that I was given the opportunity to work
three
Change preposition
for three
show examples
 months at your organization. Thank you for hiring me and I assure you that I will give my full contribution to your company during
this
Linking Words
 period. As a recent marketing graduate, I am eager to get exposure
in
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to
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 developing campaign strategies.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I would
also
Linking Words
 like to learn about digital marketing
as well as
Linking Words
 developing concepts for advertisements to attract the target audience. I would like to know more about the projects in progress in the department. Would you allow me to be a part of the strategy team? If so, please let me know more details, so that I
could
Wrong verb form
can
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 prepare well in advance to contribute successfully.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, will I directly be reporting to you? Appreciate it if you could let me know more details. You may reach me at [email protected] Looking forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Madonna Samasundera

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Task Achievement
To further enhance your letter, consider adding specific examples or areas of interest within digital marketing or campaign strategies that you are particularly keen on learning. This can add depth to your explanations and show your enthusiasm more explicitly.
Task Achievement
Including a brief mention of how your skills or studies could benefit the team or specific projects could strengthen the impact of your letter and show your proactive attitude.
Coherence & Cohesion
For an even smoother flow, try using a wider variety of linking words or phrases to connect your ideas more seamlessly. Though your current structure is clear, additional transitional phrases could enhance readability.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your letter has a clear structure, with a distinct opening, body, and closing, facilitating easy reading and understanding.
Task Achievement
You effectively acknowledged the opportunity and expressed gratitude, which sets a respectful and positive tone right from the start.
Task Achievement
Your queries are relevant and show your eagerness to prepare and contribute, demonstrating proactive engagement with the upcoming work experience.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • appreciative
  • hands-on experience
  • skill enhancement
  • networking opportunities
  • mentorship
  • organisational structure
  • company ethos
  • onboarding process
  • professional development
  • collaborative environment
  • shadowing
  • logistics
  • corporate attire
  • reporting hierarchy
  • team dynamics
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