The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.

#numbers #visitors #ashdown #museum #year #show #surveys #visit #two #periods

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This

Linking Words

chart explains to the reader the answers to surveys asking guests how satisfied they were with their visit to Ashdown Museum the

year

Use synonyms

before and the

year

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after the renovation.

Firstly

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, a

year

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ago before the refurbishment, 15% per

cent

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of visitors are very satisfied with their trip to Ashdown Museum.

However

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, after redecoration is 20 per

cent

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more than the

year

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before the restoration.

Secondly

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, the percentage of dissatisfied communities sharply fell down by 25 per

cent

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Although

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we can see many ups and downs in the chart, surprisingly the number of people who wouldn’t prefer to answer is the same before and after the remaking.

Thirdly

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, the amount of society whom they vote satisfied with their tour of the Ashdown Museum is 10

percent

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per cent

show examples

more than the

year

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before the renovation. All in all, we can understand from the chart there is a 5 per

cent

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fall down in the very dissatisfied part before the refurbishment.

Submitted by muratulun on Thu Jul 20 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words year, cent with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

159 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

refurbishment
visitor statistics
satisfaction survey
seasonal trends
demographics
benchmarking
feedback mechanisms
amenities
exhibitions
customer experience
turnaround
user engagement
footfall
improvements
disparities
perception
enhancements

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The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.

The government intends to ban smoking in public areas. Some people say that it is a good idea, but others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many people who care for the elderly do not have enough time to look after them. What are the problems related to this? What are some possible solutions?

Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits, TV channels. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspaper or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying.

Some people think that men and women have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree of disagree?