Music play an important role in society, other think it is simply a form of entertainment for individuals. Discuss both view and give your opponion?

#music #role #society #form #entertainment #individuals #opponion

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The influence of

music

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human’

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human

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life has been a topic of concern in

today

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today's

show examples

society. There are those who argued that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

music

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has a profound

imapct

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impact

on society as a whole,

others

Correct word choice

while others

show examples

believe that

this

Linking Words

is only a genre of

activitiy

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activity

activities

specifically catering

Change preposition

to entertaining

show examples

entertaining

Replace the word

entertainment

show examples

purposes to individuals.

This

Linking Words

essay will delve into both sides of the statement and

then

Linking Words

show my own perspectives. Of course, it goes without saying that

effectiveness

Correct article usage

the effectiveness

show examples

music

Use synonyms

when it

come

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comes

show examples

offer

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offering

show examples

a sense of

joys

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joy

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and

satisfactory

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satisfaction

show examples

for audiences. Many consider listening to

music

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as a way to

entertaint

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entertain

their leisure time

such

Linking Words

visting

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visiting

theaters

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theatres

show examples

or concerts, enjoying the vibrant environment or relieving stress after a long hour of study or work.

Moreover

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, it would take a significant time to learn how to play new instruments, by

praticing

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practising

greatly;

thus

Linking Words

, they have less time to engage in

unheathy

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unhealthy

activities

such

Linking Words

smoking

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as smoking

show examples

or surfing social media. Beyond the positive sides to individuals,

music

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could offer more than that to whole

comunities

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communities

itself. By

promoing

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promoting

show examples

the traditional values through ancient songs, which once

being

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

spreaded

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spread

show examples

would preserve the local characteristics and enhance

Correct article usage

the indentity

show examples

indentity

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identity

comunities

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communities

. In Vietnam,

for instance

Linking Words

, “Ho Hue” – a local type of royal

music

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has become

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show examples

iconic

atractions

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attraction

as regarding visiting Hue city.

Besides

Linking Words

music

Use synonyms

is an effective vehicle to advertise the images of

a countries

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countries

a country

show examples

In particular

Linking Words

, with

popularity

Add an article

the popularity

show examples

of pop type, La Lisa,

for instance

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, who is a

woldwide

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worldwide

pop

stars

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star

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from Thailand

suceeded

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succeeded

in taking

advatages

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advantage

advantages

of her fame to

promoting

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promote

show examples

her motherland’s images to the

wold

Correct your spelling

world

show examples

To conclude

Linking Words

, it is

inportant

Correct your spelling

important

to say that

music

Use synonyms

not only

enable

Correct subject-verb agreement

enables

show examples

Change the article

show examples

particular individual to have fun but

also

Linking Words

allow

Correct subject-verb agreement

allows

show examples

them or

Change the article

show examples

organization to make a contribution towards developing the images of their communities.

Submitted by lnad.withad on Fri Jul 21 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
41
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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Music play an important role in society, other think it is simply a form of entertainment for individuals. Discuss both view and give your opponion?

It is often said that the government spend too much money on the projects to protect wildlife, while there are other problem that are more important. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Nowadays, some people believe that governments should invest taxpayers’ money in healthcare, while others believe that money should be used in other areas.

Some people think that competation at work, at school and daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is better for college students to live in schools than live at home with their parents. Do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.