We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that we should only help people who are from our community. I disagree with

this

point of view because I think that some societies have the possibility to be in solidarity with other areas.

Firstly

, I think that the vision could be a big problem in the future.

That is

because a rich country can have a very good economic moment but on a specific day for a specific event a country could enter a bad moment and not have the possibility to survive and if they had not been in solidarity, they would have been in big issues.

For example

, Japan is a friendly country which supports areas which have issues,

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

one day, Japan was the victim of a tsunami, and they had many problems but

due to

that they were friendly in the past they received food, clothes, and money, among others.

Additionally

, helping other societies should be done because everybody is a human. That means that there is no reason

to do

Verb problem

apply

show examples

not to support a person from a foreign zone because he or she has the same rights as anybody.

For instance

, nowadays there is a war which is fighting Russia against Ukraine, and many people from Ukraine are in a dramatic situation in my opinion any community could not support these refugees.

To sum up

, any community should help as we cannot know what will

pass

Verb problem

happen

show examples

in the future and if we will need other areas.

Also

, everybody should receive another opportunity if he or she has any problem.

Submitted by santos_dij on Fri Jul 21 2023

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task response

The essay demonstrates a partial understanding of the prompt, but the response lacks strong arguments and clear reasoning. More focus on addressing the specific points of the prompt is needed.

coherence and cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are lacking in clarity and do not effectively frame the essay. Use clearer and more concise language to introduce the topic and summarize the main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

global interconnectivity
international cooperation
ethics
moral obligation
geographical borders
diplomatic relations
economic stability
global security
resource allocation
expertise
international aid
dependency and development
sustainable solutions
local and global initiatives
community resilience

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We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that hosting an international sporting event is beneficial for the country, while others disagree. Do the benefits of hosting a major sporting event outweight the drawbacks?

In today's world, many pople own a smartphone.Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

The promoters of social media claim that they are connecting people and enabling people to share like never before. While critics claim that social media site often impinge upon one’s privacy. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decades. This has made oversea travel much more accessible. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.

In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by fast foods. This has a negative impact on families, individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?