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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph shows the number of visitors to a variety of art galleries in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and repo fling the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The chart below provides data about how many people visited important art galleries from different countries in 2011. There are 3 major aspects to describe.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the museum that apparently was the most popular in 2011 is Louvre. The
amount
Check wording
number
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 of people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 explored
France
Correct word choice
French
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 culture in
Louvre
Correct article usage
the Louvre
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 was significantly higher than in other cultural
centers
Change the spelling
centres
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.
Moreover
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, the number of visitors
of
Change preposition
to
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 the Metropolitan was twice that of the Museo del Prado.
In addition
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,
National
Correct article usage
the National
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 Museum of Korea was slightly more visited than the one
from
Change preposition
in
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 Spain. At least but not
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last
Rephrase
least
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, the most underrated exhibition was
State
Correct article usage
the State
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 Hermitage.
However
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, the number of guests at the Russian museum barely
differ
Correct subject-verb agreement
differs
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 from
situation
Correct article usage
the situation
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 in Korea and Spain
,
Punctuation problem
;
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 it remains the least visited art gallery.
To conclude
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, in
2011
Punctuation problem
2011,
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 the tourist attractions presented in the diagram showed interesting and diverse data
that is
Linking Words
 worth analysing.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • visitor numbers
  • fluctuations
  • peak season
  • off-peak season
  • trend
  • visitor demographics
  • attendance
  • special exhibition
  • promotional campaign
  • footfall
  • gallery capacity
  • cultural attraction
  • art enthusiasts
  • exhibit
  • statistical comparison
  • tourist attraction
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