IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people believe that young people who commit serious crimes，such as a robbery or a violent attack should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In to contemporary era, The number of youngth crimes was too increased ,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
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Linking Words
However
Add the comma(s)
,However
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 that many punishments
has
Change the verb form
have
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awful
Add an article
an awful
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 impact on
to
Change preposition
apply
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all young people's life ,It
really
Add a missing verb
is really
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 still
until
Change preposition
apply
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Now controversial
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
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,with a significant with most of
interested
Replace the word
interest
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 in young people's issues .In ,
this
Linking Words
 essay I will explain both opinions with clear
example
Fix the agreement mistake
examples
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.
at
Change preposition
In
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 the beginning I will talk about the effects of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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equal punishments
both
Change preposition
for both
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 young and a dult
it
Capitalize word
It
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 was
no
Correct your spelling
not
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 fair
,
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apply
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because the first reason is the knowledge of each they
is
Change the verb form
are
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 totally different ,the interest and the thinking about the root of things in young still growing of the oboist, of the adults which they have complete knowing around the life with good experiences ,the sconed point the psychology of young was a fast influence with inactive behaviours that may get it from a prison,
for
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example
Add the comma(s)
,example
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 many of one how entering with easier problems
then
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 they learn
a huge crimes
Correct the article-noun agreement
huge crimes
a huge crime
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 from the others'.
On the other hand
Linking Words
 ,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
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 of people guess that makes the rate of crime
increases
Fix the agreement mistake
increase
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 in their society ,
Linking Words
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
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 that apply
of
Change preposition
apply
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strong punishment will keep everyone
respects
Wrong verb form
respecting
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 the limits of others and try to
voided
Change the verb
void
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 the problems from an early age .
To conclude
Linking Words
, I firmly believe that ,is the young one need more careful care because
this
Linking Words
 start of age
need
Change the verb form
needs
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diceaded
Correct your spelling
diced
 all our life ,we should
tretment
Correct your spelling
treatment
 and focus on problem
than
Correct your spelling
then
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 found the suitable solutions.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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