In many countries, there are a lot of students who commit suicide each year. What are the reasons for this? What are the solutions?

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Recently the phenomenon is
is
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apply
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a tragic issue that
student
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suicide needs attention.
However
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, factors like academic
pressure
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by adults and bullying contribute to the risk and
pressure
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. From my perspective, the government and society must bear some of
this
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responsibility. There is no doubt that the
pressure
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to excel academically can have severe consequences on
student
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mental health. The constant
pressure
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to achieve high grades and maintain a successful
for
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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future can lead the feeling of hopelessness and suicidal ideation whenever they get failure. A better example of
this
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can be best provided by
in
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apply
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recently
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recent
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,
Korea's
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Korea
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Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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, who
are suffer
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are suffering
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from
highly
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high
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pressure
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from their parent,
have
Correct pronoun usage
who have
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the
Correct article usage
a
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large
percent
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percentage
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of suicidal
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student
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students
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in the world.
For instance
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, bullying and harassment can have devastating effects on
Use synonyms
student's
Fix the agreement mistake
students'
show examples
mental health and increase the risk of suicide. The young people face constant ridicule,
humiliation
Correct word choice
and humiliation
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from peers can lead to profound emotional distress, often resulting in feelings of hopelessness and despair. The first possible measure is that information about
Use synonyms
student’s
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students’
show examples
rights is widely disseminated through mass media. Children who are well-informed about their rights are in a better position to seek help to defend them.
Secondly
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, it is crucial to have access to independent confidential sources of help. In some socially-advanced models, children seek
the
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apply
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help from hotlines that can provide necessary support and assistance to those suffering from
these
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the
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mental health consequences of bullying.
Finally
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, giving children the opportunity to make choices and decisions for themselves.
This
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fosters independence and shows respect for their autonomy. In conclusion, there are two factors contributing to
this
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increase include academic
pressure
Use synonyms
and bullying. It seems quite clear that
this
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problem would probably be seen as excessive and difficult to enforce.
However
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, the government and society should take action quickly in order to decrease
this
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phenomenon.
Submitted by sinh.ielts on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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