It is believed that the education system is the most critical factor to the development of a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this belief?

#education #system #factor #development #country #belief

Enhancing the domestic educational level is the goal in many nations around the world,

while

some suggest that in certain circumstances upgrading educational sources should be considered a priority,

such

as in regions where the majority of residents are under the poverty line. I personally believe a better

education

system

is crucial to enhance the development of a country by cultivating a large number of professional talents. On the one hand, some believe that in certain regions, it is more crucial to focus on saving residents from poverties and enhancing the safety of their living environment,

such

as in developing countries, since students will not be able to enjoy the educational sources when they could bearly survive.

For example

, there are many children in Thailand who need to support their family at an early age, an outstanding

education

system

is useless for them compared to having a stable life.

On the other hand

, I am in favour of using

education

to provoke a profound change in societies which plays an essential role to make progress in a country. First of all, having an

education

is crucial to reverse one's life with more opportunities and competitiveness.

For instance

, students who are born

Change preposition

into

show examples

poverty families are able to reverse their life based on a better

education

system

. On top of that, countries benefit from a large number of talents in various industries, including medicine and business, which helps a nation to make progress,

such

as Taiwan, which applies a

system

of compulsory basic

education

national wide, ensuring all citizens' rights and obligations of having

education

, derive a great number of students continued pursuing higher

education

and cultivate many talents in different industries, including high-tech industry. To summarise, it is inevitable that in certain situations, a better

education

system

should not be the priority of local governments when there are more emergency issues to be addressed.

However

, I do believe that the power of

education

should not be overlooked, since it could decrease the poverty rate in a nation and cultivate professional workers which benefits the development of a country.

Submitted by unapoya0916 on Mon Jul 24 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

348 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Critical factor
Economic growth
Innovation
Informed citizenry
Social mobility
Disadvantaged backgrounds
Social and economic status
Holistic approach
Technology adoption
Industrial development
Environmental sustainability
Democratic processes
Decision-making
Political stability
Infrastructure development

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It is believed that the education system is the most critical factor to the development of a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this belief?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Write a letter to the hotel making the arrangements. Let them know when you will be arriving and leaving, what type of rooms you would like, and ask them how much the weekend will cost. Also enquire about activities and places of interest near the hotel.

You have read a magasine article that mentionned a place you are familiar with There was a mistake in the article. Write a letter to the editor of the magasine and say what error was explain that you are familiar with the place wgy it is omportant to correct the error

Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have a risk. Do you think that advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

Watching a live performance such as play, concert, or sporting event is more enjoyable for the audience. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?