Sone children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a position or a negative development?

In these days,
children
have
starsted
Correct your spelling
started
using their
smartphones
since early ages and they often spend
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
plenty of time on these digital devices. In
this
essay, I will present some reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
problem
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
give my own evaluation. There are a couple of reasons that cause
childfren
Correct your spelling
children
are depend
Change the verb form
are depended
show examples
too much on smart devices.
To begin
with, a lack of supervision from parents and school can lead to
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
young people
overuse
Wrong verb form
overusing
show examples
smartphone
Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
show examples
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
long hours without awareness because
children
or teenagers are not enough mature to control themselves to stop playing
phones
Change preposition
on phones
show examples
and many social apps like
titok
Correct your spelling
TikTok
,
facebook
Capitalize word
Facebook
show examples
and Instagram are highly
atractive
Correct your spelling
attractive
and addicted.
As a result
, after many weeks that their parents do not remind them,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
of
children
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
formed a habit of using
smartphones
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
.
From
Change the preposition
In
show examples
my opinion, I believe that the utilization
smartphones
Change preposition
of smartphones
show examples
everday
Correct your spelling
every day
has bad impacts on
children
.
Firstly
, the main purpose of most
children
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
is not to research information or learn lessons is to serve for entertainment and
obvious
Add an article
the obvious
show examples
evidence is that social sites and action games are often popular
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
children
.
This
trend
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
them not interested in learning and
develop
Wrong verb form
developing
show examples
theirsevles
Correct your spelling
themselves
.
In addition
, they
also
become lazy in doing
excersie
Correct your spelling
exercise
due to
spending on
smartphones
. In conclusion, the habit of using
smarphones
Correct your spelling
smartphones
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
at
Change preposition
for
show examples
children
originates from
absence
Correct article usage
the absence
show examples
of
reminder
Fix the agreement mistake
reminders
show examples
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
their parents and I do not think that
this
development is positive for
children
.
Submitted by tram.vomy on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: