The mass media, including television, radio and newspapers, has great influence in shaping people's ideas and their minds.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?Give reasons for your answer.

Mass
media
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generally refers to means of communication that target the majority of the global demographics. In
this
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day and age, the narratives of mass
media
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are conveyed digitally and influenced by those who have major platforms
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such
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, such
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as influencers and commercial brands.
However
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, the degree to which the
media
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impacts us shall be discussed
further
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for us to better understand
them
Correct pronoun usage
it
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. It is completely agreed that the subject indefinitely affects the general population. The dissemination could be observed by the amount of engagement the particular contents receive.
For instance
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, since the cultivation of mental awareness in the 21st century, more and more people
had
Wrong verb form
have
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come up to admit having one psychological syndrome or another. Sociologist argues that the proliferation of the global population diagnosed with mental disorders has to do with the knowledge of mental health
that is
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spread through social
media
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. In short, monkey see monkey do.
This
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behaviour is
also
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prevalent if we were to observe from an economic standpoint. The world's output has tripled over the
last
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century
but
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, but
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only a small echelon of elites
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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control over
this
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marginal wealth. The scenario owes to the ideological capitalism
that is
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instilled through mainstream
media
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,especially in pharmaceutical, financial and technological fields. The fields actually hold less
merits
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merit
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than it is actually valued
which
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, which
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should be evaluated by the real demands of said sectors.
Instead
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, information failures have conditioned a large demographic to demand the products at a higher price.
To conclude
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, statistically speaking, the general public's opinions would always be polarising despite the content that they consume
but
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, but
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it is empirical to deduce that they would be highly affected one way or another
corresponding
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, corresponding
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to the size of target audiences that the
media
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achieved.

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task response
Say your view in the intro in a clear line, and end with a clear line too. Do not open with long or odd words.
structure
Give a short plan in the intro: what you will discuss and in what order.
grammar
Use short, plain sentences. Break long ideas in two or three clear lines.
coherence
Link ideas with easy words like and, but, also, because. Use first, next, finally to show order.
content
Give a small, real example for each point. Do not rely only on big ideas.
lexical
Check word use. Some words in your essay are not the right fit. Use plain, clear words.
strength
You show a clear view on the topic.
strength
There are many ideas on how media can affect people.
strength
The essay is the right length and has an ending.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • influence
  • shape
  • ideas
  • minds
  • mass media
  • television
  • radio
  • newspapers
  • reach
  • audience
  • messages
  • beliefs
  • attitudes
  • values
  • views
  • ads
  • advertising
  • bias
  • misinformation
  • truth
  • facts
  • trust
  • critical thinking
  • media literacy
  • education
  • awareness
  • check sources
  • fact check
  • source
  • opinion
  • claim
  • reason
  • example
  • presentation
  • agenda
  • selection
  • credibility
  • regulation
  • public opinion
  • communication
  • culture
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