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Band 4.5

the top priority of businesses is making money, and they do not need to have social responsibilities. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#priority #businesses #money #responsibilities
many
inviduals
Correct your spelling
individuals
 think that
businesses
 want to make
money
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 the top
prioritiy
Correct your spelling
priority
.
however
Capitalize word
However
show examples
, they do not
necessary
Change the word
necessarily
show examples
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
have public
responsibilities
.
this
 statement disagrees that their firms do not need to have responsible social. on the one hand,
businesses
 need to have responsible in
social
Replace the word
society
show examples
 because of being
safty
Correct your spelling
safe
 and good
products
. All of
products
Add an article
the products
show examples
 they are making can sell out to
people
 who run out of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
products
, so
businesses
 must check their
products
 clearly to make
believable
Correct pronoun usage
them believable
show examples
 of
people
 and have social
responsibitlities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
. It is evidence to help their
companies
making
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
 more
money
 with the top
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
priority. the benefit of having social
responsibilities
 is
make
Fix the infinitive
to make
show examples
 their
produces
Correct subject-verb agreement
produce
show examples
 develop and the flatter of
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
 will
higher
Add a missing verb
be higher
show examples
. Many services in your firms will
famouse
Correct your spelling
famous
 for areas and
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of
people
 can
be know
Change the verb form
be known
show examples
 because of your quality.
on the other hand
, if their firms do not need to have public
responsibilities
, they will not have believable in
people
 and
also
 their
products
 will not increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 selling in other countries. For
examble
Correct your spelling
example
, many
produces
Replace the word
products
show examples
 they are making will make
costumers
Correct your spelling
customers
show examples
 suspicious,
confused
Correct word choice
and confused
show examples
 and they will not buy any
products
 which are
companies
 produce.
That is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 main reason
Correct pronoun usage
that make
show examples
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
me
Correct pronoun usage
I
show examples
 believe that
businesses
Add a verb
arebusinesses
werebusinesses
show examples
 necessary to have social
responsibilities
 and they will have prioritized
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
making
money
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is important
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
 many
companies
 which need it. in conclusion, making
money
 is the priority which many
companies
 want to have.
therefore
,
businesses
 need to have public
responsibilities
 which make their priority
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
social.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • profit maximization
  • economic development
  • Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR)
  • shareholders
  • moral obligation
  • reputation
  • customer loyalty
  • sustainable business models
  • accountability
  • ethical practices
  • regulations
  • consumer expectations
  • economic sustainability
  • stakeholders
  • social impact
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