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Band 7.5

Some people think that schools are too competitive and that this has a negative impact on children. Others believe the competitive environment encourages children to achieve. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #schools #impact #children #environment
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Some state that the competitiveness of schools and its impact on
children
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 can cause a lot of issues. Diametrically opposed to
this
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, some opine that juveniles have to expose to pressure to promote their development. I believe that a combination of well-organized educational systems contributes to
children
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's studies and positive impact. On the one hand, there is no doubt that
children
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 studying in a fully competitive atmosphere easily lead to stress and anxiety.
Furthermore
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, students who struggle to keep up with high academic standards may experience a decline in self-esteem and confidence, leading to a negative perception of personal abilities.
For instance
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, some studies have shown that stress leads to serious negative emotions, even depression, and suicide.
This
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 is an important point we need to consider
due to
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 competitiveness.
On the other hand
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,
competition
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 indeed can inspire
children
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 to set higher goals and work hard to achieve them. motivating them to strive for excellence. Living in a competitive society,
children
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 can learn the importance of hard work, dedication, and perseverance, which are valuable qualities for success in today's world.
For example
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, juveniles joining a camping group try to adventure on a journey for a campaign, and during the whole process, they can get a better understanding of life and knowledge
due to
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 the setting of the campaign. Without
this
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 goal,
children
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 hardly understand the importance of
competition
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. In conclusion,
while
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 some level of healthy
competition
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 can indeed motivate
children
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 to achieve their best, it is essential to strike a balance and not let it become overly intense or detrimental. The educational system should emphasize holistic development, individuality, and cooperation rather than solely focusing on academic
competition
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.
Submitted by guojingchang0426 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • undue stress
  • academic achievement
  • critical thinking
  • interpersonal skills
  • unhealthy rivalries
  • social isolation
  • bullying
  • reduced collaboration
  • motivation
  • achieve their goals
  • resilience
  • perseverance
  • innovation
  • improvement
  • outperform
  • higher standards
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