IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

The pie chart and table below give information on tourists visiting Australia.

The pie chart and table below give information on tourists visiting Australia.
The given pie chart and table illustrate information about visitors to
Australia
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as their nationalities and average length of stay.
Overall
Linking Words
, most visitors to
Australia
Use synonyms
 come from Asia followed by Europe.
In addition
Linking Words
, American people have the longest time spent there. As can be seen, Asians have the highest population of tourists visiting
Australia
Use synonyms
 with 37% which is just 2% more than Europeans
while
Linking Words
 Americans and citizens from the rest of the world visited the country with 18% and 10% respectively. Regarding the table, the longest travel time (16 days) to
Australia
Use synonyms
 is for American dwellers whose popular activities are swimming and sunbathing and who prefer accommodation in a campground or caravan park. Plus, the average length of stay for European people is 2 days less than for USA tourists and they usually stay in 4 stars hotels and are interested in sightseeing.
Although
Linking Words
 Asians have the maximum number of tourists in the country, they just stay for a week in 5-star hotels. They enjoy sightseeing the most as well. It is
also
Linking Words
 noteworthy to mention that, other travellers from other places, like Americans, usually stay in a campground or caravan park for 10 days and they go surfing for most of their time.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words australia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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