IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Write at least 150 words. The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Write at least 150 words. The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#minutes #trips #children #country #travel #school #modes #transport #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The shown chart gives
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
trips
Use synonyms
 per year made by kids aged 5-12 in
single
Correct article usage
a single
show examples
 country between 1990 and 2010, to travel from school using different types of transportation. Which are, car passenger, walking, cycling, walking and
bus
Use synonyms
, and
bus
Use synonyms
. As
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can be seen, in 1990 the
car
Correct quantifier usage
number of car
show examples
 passenger was
near
Change the word
nearly
show examples
 4
million
Use synonyms
trips
Use synonyms
create
Change the form of the verb
created
show examples
 by children.
However
Linking Words
, the
most large
Change the adjective
largest
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 of
trips
Use synonyms
 was used by walking in 1990, that was approximately 13
million
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the total cycling amount was almost 6
million
Use synonyms
 in 1990.
Moreover
Linking Words
, walking and
bus
Use synonyms
, are nearly less than 6
million
Use synonyms
trips
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the
bus
Use synonyms
 without walking is above 6
million
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, after 20 years in
2010
Add a comma
,2010
show examples
 there was a huge
changes
Change the noun form
change
show examples
 that happened. The
car
Correct quantifier usage
number of car
show examples
 passenger increased to almost 11
million
Use synonyms
trips
Use synonyms
 that create by kids.
what
Capitalize word
What
show examples
 about walking we can
noticed
Change the verb form
notice
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
trips
Use synonyms
 just decreased to 6
million
Use synonyms
 travels. what's more,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cycling declined to 2
million
Use synonyms
 only. Even so, the walking and
bus
Use synonyms
 just decreased during that 20 years.
Overall
Linking Words
, often in
1990
Correct article usage
the 1990
show examples
 generation was having a higher
number
Use synonyms
 of
trips
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
 different types of transportation. No matter how, every new generation
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
would be
a different changes
Correct the article-noun agreement
a different change
different changes
show examples
.
Submitted by hamoudisayyah on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, trips, bus, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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