IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Write at least 150 words. The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Write at least 150 words. The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#minutes #trips #children #country #travel #school #modes #transport #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The shown chart gives
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the
number
 of
trips
 per year made by kids aged 5-12 in
single
Correct article usage
a single
show examples
 country between 1990 and 2010, to travel from school using different types of transportation. Which are, car passenger, walking, cycling, walking and
bus
, and
bus
. As
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can be seen, in 1990 the
car
Correct quantifier usage
number of car
show examples
 passenger was
near
Change the word
nearly
show examples
 4
million
trips
create
Change the form of the verb
created
show examples
 by children.
However
, the
most large
Change the adjective
largest
show examples
number
 of
trips
 was used by walking in 1990, that was approximately 13
million
.
Furthermore
, the total cycling amount was almost 6
million
 in 1990.
Moreover
, walking and
bus
, are nearly less than 6
million
trips
,
while
 the
bus
 without walking is above 6
million
.
Secondly
, after 20 years in
2010
Add a comma
,2010
show examples
 there was a huge
changes
Change the noun form
change
show examples
 that happened. The
car
Correct quantifier usage
number of car
show examples
 passenger increased to almost 11
million
trips
 that create by kids.
what
Capitalize word
What
show examples
 about walking we can
noticed
Change the verb form
notice
show examples
 the
number
 of
trips
 just decreased to 6
million
 travels. what's more,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cycling declined to 2
million
 only. Even so, the walking and
bus
 just decreased during that 20 years.
Overall
, often in
1990
Correct article usage
the 1990
show examples
 generation was having a higher
number
 of
trips
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
 different types of transportation. No matter how, every new generation
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
would be
a different changes
Correct the article-noun agreement
a different change
different changes
show examples
.
Submitted by hamoudisayyah on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, trips, bus, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
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