IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table gives information about the amount of money in developing countries by the USA, EU countries and other countries from 2006 to 2010.

The table gives information about the amount of money in developing countries by the USA, EU countries and other countries from 2006 to 2010.
#information #amount #money #countries #usa #eu
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table provides a comprehensive comparison of the amount of
money
Use synonyms
 in 3 kinds
developing
Change preposition
of developing
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 (
USA
Use synonyms
, EU and Others) during 5 years period between 2006 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, the total amount of
money
Use synonyms
 gradually increased between 2006 to 2010.
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
The USA
show examples
 had the highest number of capital from 2006 to 2010. In contrary, Other
coutries
Correct your spelling
countries
 remained the least
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 resources in five
distict
Correct your spelling
distinct
 periods. Upon the observation,
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 experienced slowly increased from 9.8 in 2006 to 11 in the next year.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there was a significant rise in 2008 around
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
17.
However
Linking Words
, the
Use synonyms
USA
Correct your spelling
US
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 slightly decreased in 2019 (16.7) and it reached
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 peak which accounts for 20.3 in 2010.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
EU
Correct article usage
the EU
show examples
 and other countries had relatively similar
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
amount of
money
Use synonyms
. In 2006, they started
from
Change preposition
at
show examples
 3.1 and 2.8 respectively. In
additon
Correct your spelling
addition
, they encountered the same pattern
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 where their
capitals
Fix the agreement mistake
capital
show examples
 continuously went up to 3.8 and 3.5 in 2008 and slowly declined in 2009.
Finally
Linking Words
, both
EU
Correct article usage
the EU
show examples
 and other
countried
Correct your spelling
countries
bounched
Correct your spelling
bounced
 back to their peaks in 2010 around 4.1 and 3.7, respectively.
Submitted by zia_ardhi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words money, usa with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slowly" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: